Thursday, December 31, 2009

blue moon new year

the amazingly bad year of 2009 is almost over! we're going to be treated to a "blue moon" to light the heavy partiers on the way to toast in 2010.

i'm still sick, so i'm gonna be here with the cute bunny! :) though I did celebrate by running a few errands ... wait, that's not really celebrating... i'm just happy to have them done. haha

I wish everyone a fun night (be careful out there) and a very happy new year.


lying: another disney weirdness

thank to my crappy line up of channels, i've watched more disney than I ever have before in my life. one odd thing I noticed is how much LYING there is in their shows. these are scripted shows.
it's mostly done for comic effect and the lies tend not to be very convincing, but i'm surprised parents aren't p.o.ed about this since it seems any time a parent or authority figure asks a question, they are to be lied to until they go away. irl, these lies wouldn't convince anyone (usually), but on the shows they always work.

if you can stand it, watch and see (evil laugh) or spare yourself some truly awful tv and take my word for it. hehe

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

charlie sheen: it's complicated

well, I only saw a few minutes of "issues with jane velez-mitchell" and jane wasn't even there, but they spent the whole time I watched on brooke mueller's 911 call.

brooke says her husband menanced her with a knife and she needs to file a report. when they ask his name there's a long pause then she says "it's charlie sheen."

now, brooke had enjoyed some early a.m. drinkie-poos so i'll let go on by the fact she could have just tried saying "charlie." maybe with the drinking and the fighting she wasn't thinking straight.

I don't know what happened between brooke and charlie. even he admits to slapping her arm and breaking her eyeglasses (not while they were on her face). brooke recanted later as everyone knows, but the case is still going forward.

basically, what I am wondering about is how can brooke have married charlie without looking into his situation with denise at least a little? I get that she's going to think, "well, that's her".

but one thing is consistent between these two cases... charlie got very angry when the wife said she was getting a divorce AND taking the children. I really can't blame him for becoming upset about this.

i'm not saying he handled things properly. and I realize there might be good reasons to separate him from his children.

however, next woman to marry charlie sheen and have a couple of his kids... do not announce your plan to take the kids away as your trump card during an argument. it makes him really angry.

most people want to see their own children. why would charlie be different? plus, doing it this way may look to him like you're only doing this due to the current argument.

if there is a very good reason to separate charlie from the children, then handle things carefully. for the children's sake.

and, heck, what about supervised visitation? surely that would be safe enough. but that would be if there's an actual good reason.

waking up one day and realizing your dumbass married charlie fucking sheen is not a good reason. it's not as though everyone doesn't know he's... well, charlie sheen.

back in the day he regularly begged jenna jameson (yes, porn jenna) for a date and she always turned him down.

she said he only wanted to go out with her because she was a porn star. in other words, he wanted to add her to his collection and she thought more of herself than that. listen to jenna. she knows.

the klum masters...

you know when you're telling a story about what THEY are doing? well, who ARE they? I don't know either, so i've named them... or at least their leaders.

years ago, I ran across the writings of a man who'd figured out numbers were very important to THEM. and he had some good points. the only problem? boy, are there a lot of numbers in the world! so, he was kind of... well, he said some odd things.

he had a clear idea of who he thought was doing whatever. he called them the "clums" this was an acromyn. since I don't remember what it meant (although I do remember not being entirely convinced they existed), i've renamed them slightly...

"klums" in honor of heidi klum who is involved in a conspiracy to put on amateur fashion shows. she also has conspired to hawk various products such as bras and cell phones. she does this via campaigns devised by a cabal of advertising and marketing people.

I also added the "masters" part to the name to indicate these are people with some sort of knowledge and power. they are capable of planning stuff and getting minions to do their bidding.

I have a lot of fun blaming things on the klum masters (since my version probably does not exist anyway). plus, it sounds better than just saying "they".

"they" don't sound impressive. "the klum masters" sound like they can get some things done.

I don't really worry if some things the klum masters do are unlikely to be the work of the same people. the concept of the klum masters if as fluid as it needs to be. who can fathom the minds of such individuals? maybe it does all go together and we just don't get it.

in fact, if they do exist, I really don't want to know about them. that's how impressive they sound.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Friday, December 25, 2009

the christmas bunny

my cute boy got some christmas vegetables! so cute!

I did some more visting today. this has been a really difficult day without daddy. I miss him a lot.

but, my bunny is cute and he cheers me up. what a sweetie!

I hope everyone had a good day.


Thursday, December 24, 2009


we had christmas early... or half of us did due to other people's obligations. we had two people permanently missing. but there were four kids who got A LOT of presents, so that was fun. I got two presents. so that was nice. someone made me some homemade candy... that's pretty neat.

I had to get a copy of daddy's death certificate before I left. that wasn't too fun. but I got some nice hugs.

I went and paid the gas bill and came home and collapsed. I barely did anything, but it was so tiring.

merry christmas. love, shampoo

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

oh well, of course news

first, the dvd rental boxes are busily pulling brittany murphy's movie posters that show her "dead" in a bathtub. but, it will take at least ten days (why?), so everyone will get to look.

despite reports that brittany "collapsed in the shower" that is not what her husband says happened. her mother found her in the bathroom unconscious. so her husband placed her in the shower and ran water on her in an attempt to revive her.

she was just laying on the floor when they found her. running water on her caused her to throw up everything she'd eaten, so it's a good guess that nausea may be what prompted her to go into the bathroom.

according to reports, brittany last ate the night before. for the food to still be in her upper stomach... this means her body wasn't working properly the night before. it's sad this wasn't recognized.

of course, there is still the possibility that something outside of brittany's control happened to her. I hope not, but I can understand why people would say this.

one thing a lot of people have noticed is that finding pretty pictures of brittany is difficult. by "pretty" I mean a nice photo that is not from a movie and also isn't from a weirdly-themed photoshoot. so, a lot of people are using red carpet photos.

all of brittany's photoshoots seem to be very screwed up... there is the eyes wide shut one, the one in the leather mask, the one where she has a whisk in her pocket (seriously), and lots where we see her panties even though she looks like she's unhappy to be showing them. it's sad... she was so pretty... there should be hundreds of wonderful pictures of her.

in any case, brittany's funeral will be christmas eve. the hollywood haunted tour van has already been spotted driving past her house (by tmz).

meanwhile, britney spears will continue to be controlled by her father. she's been ordered to pay him and a whole gang of lawyers a lot of money. I thought britney's spending habits were part of why she had to have someone riding herd on her?

so, I suppose we have at least another year before we see the pink wig. brit brit is probably counting the days...

some people are shocked that frances cobain may have been exposed to some form of domestic violence. this is partly due to the custody arrangements, but there's also a restraining order... still, all you really have to know is this involves courtney love.

that nutcase from westboro baptist church has embarrassed christians by declaring that god "hates" lady gaga. he (the preacher) calls her "a prancing hussy."

now, how would he know what god thinks? and why would god "hate" lady gaga? that's silly.

but "prancing hussy" is probably accurate enough. and it's a bit catchy. song idea, lady gaga?

the sun and christmas

last night I read a rather beleaguring post that said we'd all been tricked into celebrating the winter solstice by the placement of christmas. some people had argued about this, of course.

but one thing I know: christmas dinner is delicious. so, if we just manage to eat it slightly off the winter solstice, surely that will solve any provlem? ;)

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

non-holiday holiday activities

i know not everyone has done this, but i have spent some christmases by myself. maybe something work-related was going on or i was sick or whatever else. i suppose my family could've come to see me, but they didn't. so i spent the day by myself. sometimes when spending a holiday alone and sick in a small apartment, you kind of want to do something non-traditional to take your mind off the fact that it is a big holiday. so, here's a few things i used to do...

1. eat something you really like that is not associated with the holiday... even if you have to go to your grocer's freezer to get it, find something you consider a big of a treat. one year, i had ravoili with lobster. it's much simpler than trying to fix a holiday meal and it's unlikely to bring up nostalga.

2. watch non-holiday television... whether it's anime or horror movies, there's a alot out there that isn't very holiday oriented. choose something that is not really much like what your family would choose if everyone was to attempt to agree upon a movie.

3. make your call home early in the day... don't wait until right before bed to make your call to your family. that just gives you something to think over when you're trying to sleep. do it early in the day when they're busy and excited and when you have plenty of time to get yourself back into a good mood.

4. allow yourself treats, but realize they can be non-holiday specific... when you scoop up your holiday meal at the store, pick up some treats. if you really like something holiday-oriented, then by all means get that. but don't be afraid to get something utterly un-christmas-y. obviously, i'm not talking about eating your weight in candy, but something reasonable. maybe some popcorn to enjoy while you watch your movies, some fresh fruit, or something for dessert. plan and then you don't have to worry about calories when it comes time to eat. for people who are tempted to over eat, this also helps prevent that. remember, you are ONE person. buy accordingly.

5. get yourself a present. it doesn't have to be expensive. just something frivolous that you think will be fun. i tend to like books and magazines. but, make up can also be a fun treat since 12-26 will probably find me at work.. new makeup can be a lot of fun to vary things up.

6. look at the religious side of things. if you are a christian, christmas is an important holiday. you can read your bible. if you haven't brushed up on the nativity story in a while, this can be pretty interesting. if you're not a christian, i suppose you could remember it's primarily a religious holiday, so it's really no big deal if you miss it. hehe

7. don't drink, etc. if you're really and truly sad, don't try to cover over your sorrows by drinking or overeating or anything else. be proactive and keep your mind occupied. go online and talk to people you may know on various newsgroups, etc. read funny blogs. call people you know... there will be someone who's bored of what they have going on and is happy to take a break and talk for a while. if they can't, don't take it personally. a lot of people don't have control over their own time at the holidays due to family obligations.

8. learn from this experience... once you've gone through a christmas by yourself, it's a skill you have. it's not so bad or scary any more. people may say things to try to make you feel bad about this, but they're being assholes. plenty of situations can occur that puts you in this position and anyone who'd rub this is your face probably would be crying like a baby if they were in the same situation. it's just a fact that this is a time of the year that no matter how many friends you have, you may wind up alone if they REALLY have to go hang out with their families.

9. don't feel obligated to explain what you did to people you don't know... since my christmases alone usually found me at work early on the 26th, i'd just tell everyone i had a nice christmas. i didn't tell them i was by myself unless i really was friends with that person. i didn't lie either. when they ask you if you had a nice christmas say "yes". then divert the topic back to what they did.

10. don't punish yourself... some people (in my family) have tried to suggest doing work to take my mind off of christmas. like waxing the floor kind of work. unless this is something you actually enjoy, don't do it. even if you're by yourself, you still deserve a fun and relaxing holiday.

all in all, i have to say that the christmases i spent alone weren't the best christmases, but they also weren't the worst christmases. they were o.k. the first time was really strange, but after that it got easier. i've really only done it a handful of times. but it's better than doing something just for the sake of doing it. if you try it and really cannot stand it, then i'd advise always trying to celebrate with people somehow.. such as having christmas early or late.

i won't be spending christmas alone this year, but i will be in the house alone for the first time in a really, really long time. so, that has made me think of some of the ways i used to get through the days when my work always made me pointlessly come in at 8 a.m. on 12/26 (seriously, there was no real reason for this). sometimes i'd try driving home to get in what holiday time i could, but this wasn't always possible. may i had to work late on the 24th or maybe the weather would be bad or maybe i'd be sick.. whatever the case, i think it made me a stronger person to do it (although i certainly wouldn't do it for only that reason). i really miss daddy and i will miss going through the day with him as i have for the past several years.

i hope you have a great holiday. merry christmas. love, shampoo.

merry christmas...

world peace?

now is the time we all ask what we want for christmas or for our new year's wish or whatever it is we do this time of the year. of course, we all know we ought to wish for something for the good of all mankind (humankind, earthkind). but, we usually want something. who can help it?

except, i don't this year. i can't really think of anything i REALLY want. i miss daddy and that's mostly what i can think about. otherwise, i don't know.

i'm sure i will like anything i get, but my siblings aren't likely to get me much anyway, so it's just as well to not get my hopes up in that regard. generally, i get cut out of all of the christmas pictures except the one where we'd all pose with daddy. they kind of had to leave me in there. my father could remember how many kids he had, after all. the reason for this, i guess, is they have kids and i don't. i just have me. and i suppose they figure they've looked at me long enough.

i have already gotten some presents and they were all really nice. i got some nifty new p.j.s that i am currently wearing. they came with a matching blanket, too. how neat is that?

and i got a whole bunch of neat magazines, dvds, and books. so that is super neat and exciting. i'm sure these things will really keep me company this long, cold winter. i haven't spent too much time with these so far, which causes my boyfriend concern. but i am enjoying visiting with everyone. most of the stuff i got were things that you have to fully concentrate upon to enjoy, so i'll look at these more closely when i get home.

most importantly, my bunny boy has a new water bottle!!! oh, he love it so much. he drinks and drinks and drinks. then he licks his sculpture (salt lick), then he drinks some more. he's so adorable. he's also been taking a bath for the last fifteen minutes, so i see some more enjoyment of his water bottle in his future. the bunnies, they are cute.

holiday driving

like everyone else in america, i have somewhere to drive this christmas (granted, some people don't have to go very far). although my reason is a bit different.

i went to the doctor out of town (i went to a specialist) and now i have to get back to where i was.... in order to be in our house without daddy and go to deal with my siblings. i'm not looking forward to this. right now, i am much cozier and my bunny is happily settled in... he's so happy! he has another bunny friend here. oh and the cuteness is almost more than can be born... those bunnies!

but, there will be hell to pay if i miss christmas and i am trying to gather my courage in between feeling dizzy and all that. it's probably just my asthma acting up or i may be getting mildly sick. since i just saw the doctor, i'm not concerned that i have anything terribly serious.

i have to drive through three cities... but it's the smallest one of the bunch that is the greatest pain in the butt. it's got the crappiest roads ever. it's like they paved the interstate back in 1975 and decided that was good enough for the next 50 years or so. every time i drive through there it screws up my car.. i think their crapola interstate may have been why i had a blowout (as in my tire ripped apart) last time. so, i'm dreading that.

every time i mention what a pain it is, people tell me of bigger cities they've driven in.. it's like i drive in two much bigger cities in my drive, but both are easier to get through (once you kind of learn their way of doing things) because they have better roads. and it seems they're set up to handle the traffic better. unfortunately, there is no way to skip this city, so i'll just have to suck it up and drive through. i know their surface streets aren't that much better. it's weird. but it's like two different states are playing chicken with it to see if they can wait each other out into paying for some updating of the road.

at any rate, i have to drive it and soon. so, pray for me. :)

Monday, December 21, 2009

Brittany Murphy (11-10-1977 to 12-20-2009)

Sadly, Brittany Murphy passed away Sunday morning at 10:04 a.m. An ambulance was called to her home at 8 a.m. and she was taken to Cedars-Sinai hospital. Despite efforts, she could not be revived.

Brittany's family says she had been sick with "flu like" symptoms for a few days prior. Her husband, in fact, had recently been transported from LAX to the hospital with similar symptoms. There are reports that Brittany suffered from a heart condition and diabetes.

Having lived with both diabetics and heart patients, Brittany being so sick could have thrown off the minerals in her body which, in turn, stopped her heart. A lot of people do not realize this can happen... given her very young age Brittany may not have been aware of how serious her condition was until it was too late. The strength of youth sometimes masks important symptoms.... and sometimes heart patients can forget about their underlying condition when faced with an illness that causes them to throw up, etc. Whatever, the case, this is a very sad loss to anyone who enjoyed Brittany's work.

There is a lot of speculation about drugs, but I can easily see how this sad event could have happened naturally. In any case, an autopsy will be conducted including toxicology tests. If this was not a natural event and someone did something to Brittany, I hope they are brought to justice. If she did something to herself, I think she probably didn't realize how weak she was... it would be very hard to judge such things in her condition. So, I don't think people should judge her too harshly.

But, right now, I am just really sorry to hear about this. Although Brittany had not been doing as many movies as she used to, she was still working regularly and had four movies in production at the time of her death.

Rest in peace, Brittany. You will be missed.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

the snakemonster: devoid of any semblance of talent

I don't know exactly why, but the people at cracked call miley cyrus the snakemonster. possibly because she has no discernable talent so the only assumption we can make is that she is something evil. like a snakemonster.

yes, I watched her "party in the usa" video. this would also be the first (and I pray the only) time to have heard this "song."

well, I have to apologize all over the place to lady gaga. she is a gorgeously beautiful and fabulous nightengale. talent forms an aura of awesomeness all around her. she also manages not to look like a prostitute being dragged in to nightcourt in her sexy weird outfits.

miley can't sing, she can't dance, she has a bad personality, she can't act, she's not very pretty, she is annoying.

not only does she have one, but her career has revitalized billy ray's career. I cannot overstate how much I never wanted that to happen.

billy ray can't sing, he acts like a big wooden ham, he has negative charisma... I just can't stand him. I never could. but he's back and they even made a made for tv movie for christmas with him. which means we'll have to see it 65 times per year every year that has a christmas.

also, they are grooming miley's younger sister noah to do whatever miley does. so, pretty soon there will be two of them. plus, miley has a brother who's in a band or whatever.

back to "party in the usa"... it was BEYOND AWFUL. there seems to be something sinister about it.

miley, wearing her usual whorewear, is kicking through the dust and walking by pickup trucks. the place where the video is set looks like a good location for an if you like dirt and desolation in your d├ęcor.

the lyrics are a bit sickening... something about seeing the hollywood sign and being excited. then remembering at the moment she saw it she was listening to a jay-z song.

then she tells us she's nodding her head and moving her hips and there's a party in the usa. it disturbs me and I think it gave me a nightmare.

at the end of the video, miley and her grubby (pretend) friends are in a big old birdcage. miley's standing up on the swing and everyone else is climbing around.

I am afraid. I hope the pristine lady gaga does not associate with such people. say what you will, at least with lady gaga I can usually figure out that i'm listening to someone sing. also, I never have to see lady gaga doing weird things with her dad.

and mind you, lady gaga does things like wear a fetish suit, "bleed" during performances, and carry around a teacup. but, she actually has a pretty voice when you get a chance to hear it. and I have never heard her screeching about her purity ring.

this reminds me, one of the jonas brothers (kevin? I don't know, the one oldest maybe) was prancing about in an aleister crowley t-shirt. now, I have never once run across an aleister crowley shirt in a store, so he had to deliberately obtain this shirt. I wonder what his pal aleister crowley would think about purity rings.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

laura ingraham, now on my list (not a good thing)

note: i just rewrote this article a bit since i re-read it and noticed my writing was not really very good. i'm going to blame proximity to fox news.

my "list" denotes nutcases whose constant blathering is offensive and potentially dangerous. these are people i just avoid watching or reading. i didn't watch foxnews back when i had it. now that my satellite package doesn't include it... well, that is a good thing. i never have to worry about running across glenn beck's crazy, glittering eyes every time i flip through the channels.

apparently, some conservative types and their esteemed leaders from fox news spent time in washington bitching against health care reform. at the rally the loons held, laura ingraham reworked a poem from just after world war ii. of course, her version is insulting and illogical, but here goes:

Laura Ingraham's Lament (as titled by Shampoo) or Variation of Another Poem
"first they came for the rich, and i did not speak out because i wasn't rich. then they came for the property owners and i did not speak out because i did not own property. then they came for the right to bear arms and i did not speak out because i was not armed. then they came for me and denied me my medical care and there was no one left to speak for me."

er.... o.k. first, rich people aren't going to be denied care unless they are trying to force the doctor to do something that is illegal (and maybe not even then). property owners may not actually be rich, but property can be sold or mortgaged to obtain money to pay a doctor.

in the "laura's" poem "they" seems to refer to the people who might pass laws that annoy the poem people. additionally, "they" seem to have some way of affecting abstract concepts because they next come after the right to bear arms. what this has to do with healthcare is anyone's guess, but it's interesting they don't to take the guns.

finally, laura gets tangled up in an impossible situation... she's denied healthcare and there is no one to speak out for her. although, she doesn't explain why this should be so. in her version of the poem, people aren't rounded up and in thrown in prison. so they should still be around. perhaps they just felt it was only fair that laura suffer the same annoyance. however, the real reason that line is in there is because it's in the original poem.

the original poem is attributed to pastor niemoller (1892-1984). he'd originally supported hitler due to his anti-communist views. but when hitler decided that the state was more important than religion, niemoller lead a group of clergymen against this. he was arrested in 1937. niemholler was held at sachsenhausen and dachau until being liberated by allied forces in 1945. in speeches as early as 1946, niemoller began to use the poem. it was published in 1955 in They Thought They Were Free by milton mayer.

here's the real poem...

First they came for the communists, and i did not speak out because i was not a communist;
then they came for the trade unionists, and i did not speak out because i was not a trade unionist;
then they came for the jews, and i did not speak out because i was not a jew.
then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak out for me.

in this poem, it should be obvious why no one is left... when "they came" for people it means those people were physically taken away. so, the poem people who were already taken are either dead or imprisoned awaiting execution because this poem is about the holocaust.

niemoller did vary the groups mentioned in the speeches he gave. in 1971, he said the groups i used above were the groups that should be included. but other groups he mentioned were the "incurably ill", jehovah witnesses, and people in occupied countries.

in 1955 a german professor paraphrased this niemoller's poem using communists, socialists, the press, schools, and the jews. this version ends with "the church" being left for last. although this doesn't really follow the intent of the original poem because "the church" is a group at least, it still conveys the horror of the original.

when "they came" it means "they" literally dragged away the person they came to get. in some cases, these people were immediately shot dead. in other cases, they would be imprisoned in a concentration camp where executions, as well as deaths caused by the deplorable conditions in which people were held, costs millions of lives. it is sickening someone would use this poem to voice some complaints over some legislation.

as far as "the rich" go... in the holocaust some rich people were able to buy their way out of their situation. there's even a movie about a very rich couple who owned an international company as well as some choice property. in exchange for their lives and the lives of many of their employees, they signed legal documents that gave the nazis a lavish mansion filled with costly artwork, money, etc.

of course, this was an extremely wealthy couple who had international connections, but still. i think if they could negotiate their way out of the holocaust, surely they'd be able to handle whatever laura ingraham is whining about. perhaps laura doesn't know that money is always a helpful thing to have when you're BUYING something.

i don't know what she was trying to prove, but then her literary references are perhaps limited. she also referred to nancy pelosi and harry reid as "grinches who stole healthcare." which means, i suppose, she equates the grinch with nazis which would put her at odds with some of her fellow fox newsites who seems to hold nazis in very high esteem.

i am so very, very glad that i don't have fox news in my satellite package. i saw this on "the daily show". jon stewart had a few things to say about this nonsense, be sure of that. he did a way better job than i did so it might be worth looking up if you missed it.

in researching this, i found both rush limbaugh and glen beck have mentioned this poem lately to illustrate the so-called persecution they're enduring. i am not sure exactly what happened, but i think they believe the white house got a wee bit impatient with them. please give me a break. rush limbaugh has broken laws that would cause many people who don't have radio shows to be thrown in jail for a considerable amount of time. both of these idiots are very racist and seem to be doing everything they can to tear this country apart. i don't think know what it was obama's subordinates did to annoy r.l. and g.b. whateverf it was, it seemed to be too slight an action to even warrant mentioning it. i find them even more ridiculous than laura. if all the white house is doing is being a bit frosty where's the problem? it didn't sound as if anyone was trying to stop them from farting nonsense into the public airwaves, so i'm putting this down to these two babies just wanted some more attention. it's exactly in keeping with their sorry ass characters to compare their own slight annoyance with people being systematically rounded up and kiilled. really, someone at fox news needs to do a memo about "appropriate analogies" (er, including definitions for those two words).

Full Moon on New Year's Eve

For all the drunk bitches stumbling through their new year's even reveleries, good news! Your path will be lit not only by car headlights, street lights and neon signs... you'll also have a nice full moon! Pretty! :)

Be careful and have fun! it almost makes me want to forget my vow to never get drunk on champagne ever, ever, ever again. haha

Hopefully, the folk wisdom that the full moon brings out the crazy in people will prove untrue unless by "crazy" they mean more dancing at parties.

i don't know what i plan to do yet, but there's not that much around where i live, so... maybe i'll just watch t.v., who knows.

new year's eve 99, daddy and i were both recovering from pneumonia. so we worked a puzzle and watched all the huge celebrations taking place all over the world. that was actually a lot of fun. :)

Monday, December 14, 2009

skanks and non-skanks! :)

today has been a day of the word "skank" being thrown around a lot on my tv and on the internets.

first, I was hideously disappointed to find that the tabloid at the checkout has lied (shocking, I know)! they tantalized me with the hope casey "skanky" anthony had changed her plea to guilty in exchange for her life. as far as I can tell, she hasn't done that.

granted, everyone has been chattering about that golfing skank tiger woods today. they can scarcely speak of anything else.

elin didn't wear her wedding ring today ya'll. er... duh. I don't know (or care) if she'll leave or stay. but when your male slut husband acquires a harem; you're allowed to leave the ring at home if you want.
heck, maybe she sold that bad boy (the ring, not the ho). then, if he wants her back... he's got to get her a new one.

I am so tired of everyone trying to "understand" tiger's behavior. well, how about he's a pro athlete and is livin' the life and would've kept doing it if he hadn't gotten caught.

although, I did find a site that says he's gay. there are some elements of the gay lifestyle that are a mystery me, but i'm pretty sure he's doing it wrong.

speaking of male skanks, the skank chris brown twittered a lamentation against walmart. they do not sell his latest crappy ass cd. no one cares, chris.

then there are the 13 mistresses. a lot of people are calling them "skanks" and saying they don't have jobs! yes, they do have jobs. "porn star" is a job. "hostess" is a job. "reality show ho" is a job. plus, there are some waitresses and everyone in hollywood should know THAT'S a job.
i'm not as offended by the girls as some people. some people wonder why they're all "the same type of girl".

well, speaking for the non-skank population I will say that we try to avoid men who are married with children. hello? that's a big deal.

also, I fail to see the amazing good looks tiger woods allegedly has (maybe he looks totally different in person). his sport is waiting at the dmv boring.

the only thing he really has going for him is $$$. but the people who'd have sex with someone for money are, by definition, whores (no offense, ladies, i'm not the one criticizing you) so this is going to lead around to a certain type...
plus, tiger is a total skank himself. these girls are all practically virgins compared to him, i'm sure.

the blogoverse is mystified why frances cobain's custody has been switched to her paternal grandmother and aunt. well, not why (exhibit a: the skank cl and nearly everything she's ever done), but why she didn't just go for emancipation as she's 17.

do you think courtney wants to lose her meal ticket? frances needs to be able to tell her that the court is forcing them not to live together. it will just make things easier (as in safer). courtney is a dangerous nutbar and frances needs every possible excuse to STAY FAR AWAY FROM HER.

you may have noticed I didn't call frances by her full name. why do people do that? does she go by the whole thing? or are there just a shitload of chicks named "frances cobain" (even though neither name is all that common)? do we have to put the "bean" in there to let everyone know which one? does courtney have like 20 daughters with the same name? seriously?

anyway, good luck to frances (bean). :)

Friday, December 11, 2009

tears in the courtroom

today, casey anthony, broke down in cried in court. the prosecution was opening their case by wondering if caylee, just shy of her third birthday, looked into the eyes of her killer as duct tape was being put over her nose and mouth.

yes, I am watching "issues with jane velez-mitchell" and jane is talking to casey's lawyer who's whining about "people wanting to kill casey." he's not talking about random people, he's talking about the state of florida which may execute casey if she's found guilty of 1st degree murder of her daughter.
i'm tired of him saying this. I don't want to "kill" casey, but if she's found guilty of this crime... she deserves punishment. if it is determined that this is the punishment she deserves and all of her appeals fail to overturn it... then, it may become a regretable necessity. I am not a citizen of florida and I don't know all of their laws, but I assume that's about how it works.

however, casey hasn't been found guilty yet. so, she hasn't been sentenced to anything other than to be held in jail until her case is determined. she ran around free an awfully long time after poor little caylee went missing. she even committed some lesser crimes. his ranting about people killing casey makes me wonder if that's what he expects will eventually happen. because it seems like to me he should be whining about what's happening NOW (she's in jail and isolated, even from her family) rather than what could happen IF she's found guilty. and the worse case scenario. they could find her guilty, but not sentence her to death. or geez, casey's lawyer, couldn't they find her not guilty and let her go home? you can't really blame people on the internets assuming she did it if you're kind of doing the same thing.

jane thinks she heard casey say, "make him stop" as the prosecutor talked about caylee looking at her killer as one, two, three pieces of duct tape were put over her mouth and nose. someone told whoever asked that, "I can't."

a lot of people think they know what it's like to be in a courtroom due to the bazillion courtroom dramas we've seen. i've been a juror (not on a murder case) and the real thing is very different. it's very serious and very real. no one can make it stop until it's over. and whatever happens, the course of people's lives will be changed. that may just be why casey was crying today. this isn't a hearing or whatever. this is it... she's on trial for her life.

and if she's found guilty, even if she's not sentenced to death, no one will have much sympathy for her. if she's found guilty, she won't deserve it.

but we don't have a "found innocent" option.
and in casey's case we don't need it. she still delayed reporting caylee's disappearance, she repeatedly impeded the investigation over and over by lying and leading people on wild goose chases. and then there's her shopping spree on her bff's stolen checkbook (allegedly?). if she's found not guilty a lot of people still aren't going to like her.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

there's no hope for music...

miley cyrus also met the queen. she was also wearing a red dress. (oh, and wendy williams says lady gaga's dress was leather which seems more plausible, actually.) so, red dress at important events and butterflies in weird places (gaga has been known to "play" a butterfly-covered piano and miley has them all over everything). these seem to be current indicators of acts that aren't going anywhere no matter how many innocent people their cauterwaling deafens. oh, btw, sweet lil miley (as if) "performed" with her hand near her crotch. KLASSY!!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

gaga shakes hands, newsactors go nuts

"newsactors" is a term I picked up back in the day when I used to watch a lot of community-access cable. it means the person READING the news is nothing but an ACTOR. people are coming to realize this, but then again, it's becoming very obvious... just look at some of the pretty girls on cnn. they're good at reading and have well-groomed eyebrows (that's a dlisted thing).

but, one of the most IMPORTANT things that happened today (according to the newsactors) is last night or whenever, lady gaga played at some "royal" charity concert.

before doing with this, she shook hands with the queen of england (in a receiving line). oh, and she was wearing a latex formal and had on a bunch of shiny red eyeshadow. if I hear "god save the queen... from gaga! har har har" one more time... hello, she didn't do anything? she would have been tackled to the ground and the footage would've been seized if she had.

well, here's what she didn't have on: a fucking crown. yeah, this old chick elizabeth windsor has one and it's "real" so that means she owns a country or whatever. so there you go.

lady gaga is a freaking pop star. red spandex and eye shadow are absolutely required for her. also, whatever else she is, she's not very scary. except when she "performs" what she calls "music."

to calm my nerves from this regular assault, let me ruminate on a nice musical offering called "god save the queen" by the sex pistols. they mean it, man.

not too creative...

well, I thought it might be this... but, then I thought, "that's too predictable." john phillips made some remark about cass elliot's weight that caused her to run off from her conversation with mick jagger.

also, john phillips and mick jagger seem to have worked together a bunch. they also didn't release a bunch of this, so there you go.

anyway, I am done with the mick jagger angle. which I didn't really mean to get into, but he just kept coming up... but, I guess if you work with someone that'll happen.

13 or 18?

well, I have seen two ages for mackenzie phillips in regard to her encounter with mick jagger. her book says 18, but there are some stories (pre-book, I guess) that say 13. for some reason, I thought she said she was 15 on the howard stern show, but I could be remembering wrong.

however, one thing remains weirdly consistent. mick jagger said to mackenzie, "i've been waiting since you were ten years old for this."

personally, I think it's unlikely he waited eight years, but whatever. maybe he did.

I have a feeling that when it comes to mick jagger (and john phillips, for that matter) my father would have felt his daughters were permanently underage. haha

but then again, when I got locked out of my own room (it was empty, I guess the lock broke) he used a wrecking bar to get into it. this would be after I tried every other way to get into it. he didn't even ruin the door. he was 83 at the time. and in that case the only urgency was that when we finished the mystery of the locked door he could go back to watching television and I could get into my room.

ugh (an update)

boy, am I sick. I feel so horrid...

direct tv just called and woke me up. thank GOD I didn't answer the phone. they always ask for daddy anyway.

I decided to do some research on john phillips. in doing this, I have found out a couple of interesting things that have nothing whatsoever to do with him that I may post about.

but, here is an interesting little story that is about him. back in the day (66 or 67, I think) the mamas and the papas were at a party thrown by dunhill (they were on the dunhill label owned by the dunhill company that makes "luxury cigarettes" ... it's owned by r.j. reynolds, btw) in england. now, i'm imagining that all sorts of celebs of the day are there. or at least mick jagger is there.

so, anyway, john phillips sees cass elliot talking to mick jagger. so, he comes over (as in, it sounds like, crosses the room making directly for them) and makes some remark to/about her that causes her not only to run from the room, but to try to quit the band (contractual obligations brought her back for the next album). I don't know wtf he said (yet, bwahaha), but damn. and there's mick jagger again.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

misery for shock value

hln's "showbiz tonight" (the self-proclaimed "most provocative" show) decided to use some celebrity confessions as a basis for a "shocking" show.

now, some of the celebs truly suffered something terrible. whether it happened 100 percent as they now remember (i am not saying they are lying, but this was sustained and extreme abuse so some details may be mixed up with other abuse they endured) whatever the actual details, many of these things are things NO ONE DESERVES EVER.

however, the lifelong behavior of some of these people (all have been famous for decades) show that somewhere along the line something bad happened. in some cases, we even have indications what happened and who did it.

they led off with tapes of michael jackson talking about the abuuse by his asshole father joe jackson. joe jackson is scum and ought to be in jail. period. I don't know if michael would have ever hurt anyone ever if not for joe. because compared to joe, michael was rather gentle. that's not a defense of michael. it is a condemnation of joe.

but, anyone who doesn't believe that joe jackson abuse all (or at least most of his children, i've heard janet was spared... I doubt it, but her abuse may have been less severe because she had several protectors) has not been paying attention.

there is nothing michael could say on those tapes about joe that would surprise me that joe went there. it makes me sick that michael's children have been given to his mother because she didn't protect her own children from joe... why would she protect michael's?

I am not going to repeat exactly what michael said. i'll just point a few words he said. joe had a particular abusive act that he did to michael. michael said "he made it a ritual." now, this is michael jackson only a few years before he died. so he has been mulling this fucked up stuff over for decades.

anyway joe's sick, cruel, pervert self would start beating michael after preparing him in a certain way. as things became more frenzied, katherine would start screaming, "stop it joe! you're going to kill him!" it sounds like before she started screaming, michael had already started to think this may kill him. katharine's screams did not stop joe. they only frightened michael even more. obviously, joe always eventually stopped because michael lived for 50 years. he didn't say how many times he underwent this particular "ritual" and he certainly didn't say that was the only abuse he suffered at the hands of joe. because, of course, it was not.

michael concludes this particular story saying "I hate him." but, I don't think he always felt that way. it would have been easier for him if he had. in fact, michael tells another story where joe regularly lets him know that joe is done with him if he ever stops making money. now, he was a little boy who certainly should not have been responsible for keeping his worthless parents in money.

so, I keep thinking about the christmas tape michael made with his kids (that joe or whoever whored out to the tv shows) where they sing. the kids sing well. I am sure joe is already plotting their music careers.

next shocker, mackenzie phillips, daughter of "papa" john phillips was in an insectuous relationship with her father. people, this chick has been a heroin addict from an extremely young age. she's got clean and gone back many times.

for people who may not know... john phillips is dead. since I said joe jackson belongs in jail, I wanted to clarify why I didn't say the same about j.p.

mackenzie already told us that she started using drugs with her father from a very young age and no one said anything because, hey, it's just "papa john" giving his little girl some smack (or whatever else). she's already said that she, her dad, and mick jagger were doing drugs. her dad left the room and when he came back, the door was closed and she and mick were having sex. so, her dad starts knocking on the door. but, she told the story in a very weird way that made me think she was saying he wanted back into the room, not that he wanted mick to stop fucking his underage daughter. in any case, he knew what happened at some point close in time to the event and mick jagger is still alive so... I never got the idea jp had a problem with him over it.

mackenzie told this story as though that's when she lost her virginity. but, it didn't exactly ring true. I couldn't figure out exactly why because I don't naturally think about insect... so, I am thinking mp was just talking about the first time that wasn't a dark family secret.

from what she says, she came to (she had been using a lot of drugs) having sex with her father. needless to say, this freaked her the fuck out. afterwards, she said something to him about him raping her. he says "we made love." she was a teenager at the time. this is the first time she REMEMBERS. her father may have told her how many times they'd done this before, but he probably started on her much earlier than he said. at any rate, mp very confused then kind of gets into some sort of "consensual" relationship with her and it's all just a really sad mess.

bijou says mackenzie told her about this once. then said it was not true (i don't know how much later) and so when mp said it this time bijou didn't believe her. well, I can certainly understand why bijou wouldn't WANT to believe her. but, I have a feeling, it's not so much she doesn't believe her sister... maybe she just REALLY wanted to believe the lie.

chynna believes mackenzie or, at least, she sticking by her. I get the impression this has something to do with mackenzie that she didn't want to talk about. she says it's really sad. she tried to be as positive as one could possibly be and didn't say anything negative about anyone.

mackenzie's story was surprising because it has some unusual elements to it. but, it's been clear for a long time something is seriously wrong with her. so, it's not surprising that she eventually came out with a horrible story.

ditto with rosie o'donnell. she's just done some weird things here and there that show she's had something bad happen to her early on (shown mostly by very inconsistent behavior). well, she says that she was consistently molested when she was young. her doctor even asked her when she was six if she was "touching" herself. I don't know what she told the doctor, but now she says "it wasn't me." she was pretty vague about the details (which is fine by me). so she may or may not have more to say later.

another thing she said (that they tried to make a huge deal out of) was she called oprah after the columbine shooting. she didn't really know oprah too well, but called her since they both had talk shows. so, she's sobbing to oprah about the need to "do something". she says oprah was nice about it. not really too shocking. they tried to make it sounded as if rosie told some awful secret on oprah. um, this doesn't sound bad?

kathy griffith says her brother was (is?) a pedophile. well, I guess this is shocking as I didn't know she even HAD a brother. I don't recall if this guy is living or dead. they didn't give too much time to this. they were too busy hyping the non-issue with rosie and oprah.

finally, whitney huston tells us SHE AND BOBBY BROWN DID DRUGS TOGETHER!!! OMG!!! hasn't everyone know that for 20 years? I didn't even watch her section. she also claims bobby spit on (or near) her once. this was apparently going to be part of an "abuse" story. I didn't watch it, so who knows.

in what I did see, whitney confessed to using pot and "rock cocaine." er... i'm not exactly a dea agent over here, but isn't "rock cocaine" what some folks call "crack"? didn't whitney herself say she only used expensive drugs as "crack is whack"?

I don't know why I watched any of this. oh yeah, I only have like 10 channels. but, it was a really sad and insensitive show.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

my cousin

my father's younger brother died years ago. his wife died several years later. this left my cousin living alone in his parents' house.

this situation is, therfore, quite similar to mine. except he actually OWNED the house because his mother left it to him. so, he didn't have people coming in a day after the funeral announcing, "we're going to sell this house, you know!" and he had just one sibling a few years older than himself instead of three who are much older. and he had a wife. o.k., so his situation was actually much better.

well, the wife wound up leaving him for some reason... probably because people in my family can be a little bit difficult to deal with, but I think she still loved him.

well, anyway, some days went by with her or no one else hearing from him. so, she goes to the house and there's his car. she knocks on the door, but no answer. she probably tried to call and so on, but none of that matters because she wound up having to get the police.

so, the police officer opens the door a crack and tells her to wait outside. he goes in and finds that my cousin had killed himself.

I wish he'd waited just a little longer... his wife was coming back just like he wanted, but even befor I found myself in a similar situation, I could understand why it was hard for him.

this is why I don't understand why people can't be a little nice to me. why they have to say things that would upset ANYONE. this was our cousin. we have been here before.

I miss you, j.


sometimes there are generations with way too many people and then there are ones with not so many, but then there's usually a rebound one that's nearly as big as the one before. the smaller generations are usually called lost generations. except ours who get to be called "x".

right now, I am going to send a great big fuck you to the generation sandwiched in between the wwii and baby boomers. I used to feel we had something in common with them, but everyone of them i've ever met was a resentful asshole against anyone younger than themselves. they could surely see how the boomer assholes we treating us, but instead of being a little kind, they gleefully joined right in... I know your generational icons were killed off as well, but whatever. no empathy in means no empathy out.

we get it, we're alone in this. that's why we have so many cowardly sell outs. guess what, you are still one of us whether you want to be or not. everyone knows it. hope that fronting works out for you though.

then there's the baby boomers who think they are so great. yeah, we KNOW how nasty you can be. I have to get it from my own fucking siblings. if your own family can't behave, well...

yeah, hang on to everything the wwii generation handed you on a silver platter. break my heart.

my parents WERE the wwii generation. but after they died, there wasn't a lot they could do. but, even though my own family won't believe me, I appreciate what they did for me.

also, I kept secrets... I never told daddy about the truth of project paperclip. because why MAKE THE POINT that wwii ws fought for some bullshit reason we haven't been told. because hello, the nazis are here. but, oh lord, back when my brother used to treat my father like total shit he would have said it. if he knew it. who knows if he's caught on yet.

all my childhood pictures are lost. the tapes my mother made for me are lost... were lost before I ever heard them. no one but my own family ever had access to this stuff.

that's mind kontrolle. that's how it works people. tell one generation how great, special, and smart they are. tell them how it's o.k. to hurt people if "you're making a point" or "being honest", tell them other people are "nowhere" and they believe it. forever. my thinking is probably fucked up, too, just in a different way. they let people film lsd trips as children's entertainment back in the day. I never liked that stuff.

maybe because I have been around some asshole who has used the stuff. people talked about all kinds of stuff in front of me when I was a kid because it was really easy to ignore me. I was small.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

blogger is being weird

update: this seems to have cleared up... for me anyway...

just fyi.... I got an error message when trying to view comments for one of my posts. I checked their help forum and people are getting it for various reasons... it won't allow anonymous comments, it won't let comments be viewed, problems with mobile access and so on... one person says it's eating his comments, but he has over 4000 comments on one posts, good lawd!

i'm also having to resign in every five minutes. just fyi. :)

my friend is in the hospital

UPDATE: she's out of the hospital. :)

my friend, who has a serious medical condition, is in I.C.U. she is in a tremendous amount of pain. I have been told she is crying and screaming it is so bad. i've never, ever seen her act this way. normally, she grits her teeth and bears it... and I have seen her after major operations.

last I heard, she was not responding to the medication they (finally) gave her. I hope that has changed by now. she may have taken a while to respond to the medicine just because she had been gritting her teeth and trying to bear it for so long.

please pray (or send good thoughts, think of her, whatever you feel comfortable doing) to get better soon. I didn't ask permission to post this, so I am being vague on purpose... but, she really needs some extra people pulling for her right now.

I pray that a good doctor will see what is wrong and help her. I pray that they give her the proper medicine so she can be comfortable and start to heal. I pray when I go to visit she is home and feeling good. :)

Sunday, November 29, 2009

kids & christmas

I just saw some poor guy on tv who'd lost his job. he has, among other responsibilities, a disabled child. that is really rough. I know many people are in similar positions and I really wish them well with getting a new job and being able to continue helping their families. of course, he was also concerned about what to do for christmas.

I will share a little secret I remember from my childhood... kids will ask for EVERYTHING because they have no clue how much stuff costs. however, most kids don't expect to get most of that stuff. they just want to get something off ther 30 page list. maybe 3-4 somethings, but certainly not everything (unless you have spoiled them to an insane degree or unless you are so rich you really can buy anything they want).

if you get the paper, save the colored funny pages (or get someone to do this for you). this makes great gift wrap, especially for kid's stuff. look at your junk mail, those cards that fall out of magazines... anything... cut out cute images and use these to make decorations for packages. sometimes you can get free gift tags here and there, but if you don't, use plain paper and these decorative objects to make your own. doing this allows you to cheaply wrap more packages. and that, in turn, makes it economically feasible to wrap you kid's presents in ways that make it look like the most packages. kids LOVE to unwrap stuff. so, wrap up as many as you can, even stocking stuffers, in this cost effective manner.

if you make cookies right before christmas wrap these up! you can use one of your resealable bowls since, if it's your own kids, you'll get these back. if you're giving them as gifts, you can get little containers fairly cheaply.

if your child has a doll and you can sew, make some outfits. if the child doesn't sleep with the doll, you might dress her in the new outfit and put her under the tree (unwrapped) as a surprise from santa.

remember, your children love you. just do your best... try to think of fun activities to add to christmas fun. also, be on the lookout for bargains! :)

good luck and happy holidays. :)

last car payment!

I made my last car payment yesterday. it was just a partial payment, so it was actually the smallest payment i've ever made.

before daddy had his stroke, I had my car almost paid off... I am glad he was able to know that because he was really worried about my finances.

my family kind of thinks I have the financial skills of a particularly frivolous two-year-old. this isn't true, but I have been in bad situations financially before. and then other things happened that made things look worse.

once, when I was out of town, my father kept getting calls that made him think my car was like five payments behind. actually, that was totally wrong, but he found a very misleading bill (and tore off the part that showed that i'd made three recent payments) and showed that to my sister. she called and chewed me out before it occurred to her that, duh, most of what they sent was missing (i have no idea why my father tore off what he did... I don't think he realized he threw out the most important part) so who could tell anything. but my sister had him convinced he could lose his house. yeah, our house is worth $3000 (eyeroll) which is what my car payoff was at that time. oh, and p.s. ONLY my name was on the loan and my name wasn't on his house, so... worse case scenario: they'd take the CAR.

also, I was getting some telemarketer calls mixed in... I didn't owe those people a cent, but it added to the confusion. it kind of pissed me off about my car loan people because there was no reason for them to harrass him like that.

then there was some credit card telemarketing going on and, as I told him over and over, it wasn't even saying anyone owed them money. it was trying to get us to apply for their card. but since I didn't even have a credit card, it was pretty impossible for me to owe them money.

I got something that looked like a credit card in the mail once (i don't remember if it was just an ad or something else) and he solemnly gave it to me saying, "please be careful with this." that scared me for a moment until I actually looked at it and saw it was nothing.

but, long story short, my car title should be getting here soon and i'm glad my father knew how close I was to paying it off...

I am going to have some more bills coming my way now, but that's life.


well, courtney love has taken to her poor abused computer (pda, netbook, what have you) to let us know britney spears is a sex slave to her molestor father and courtney's not gonna stand for it! she's not too clear on how she's going to stop it, but whatever.

sometimes I think courtney gets britney confused with herself. because her britney posts come out of left field like the "strapped to a gurney" rant. just all of a sudden (it seems to me, but then I do not EVER go to any of her pages), she's gotta talk about britbrt.

people are all taking this seriously. well, it could be true. courtney actually is not stupid. but she does lie A LOT.

I don't know if she even knows britney. for some reason, I just can't see those two hanging out even if they do have some similar interests.

meanwhile, the unfortunate dj qualls apparently hooked up with courtney. people, leave her alone. good grief. but then again, i'm sure he was no match for her feminine wiles. although I am a bit surprised she chose him, but it was thanksgiving. most people were too busy eating.

just to terrify myself further, I looked up courtney on who's date who (i know it should be "whom"). here's who they list (note, apologies to any guys who do not belong on this list):

fred durst (er... courtney?), he's a leo!
ian wagner
jeff buckley, a scorpio!
russell brand, gemini
ted nugent (in 1976?! wtf? courtney was 12 then!), sagittarius
james moreland (first husband, a musician, who is now scared of her. took out an ad to try to warn kurt about her)
billy corgan (her especial pet), pisces
kurt cobain (second husband), pisces
edward norton, leo
scott weiland, scorpio
trent reznor, taurus
jim barber
howard stern (the dj, not that dude who married anna nicole), capricorn
julien casablancas, leo
steve coogan, libra
jamie burke

that's the website list... I don't know the significance of everyone's signs. cl is a cancer BTW.

I know this is not everyone. in fact, some of these guys... o.k., I am hoping the ted nugent thing is wrong, but probably not. what a perv. I have seen a picture of cl when she was around that age, she did not look like a grown woman.

i've heard evan dando got to spend some time with cl and her special teddy bear (sick!).

I have no idea why i'm talking about this... oh yeah, of course she knows stuff, but you can never trust her. never.

negative me

my sister was here yesterday and things were much better.

my brother was around thanksgiving and the day after and got all pissy and told me "there's a lot of negative noise coming off of you."

no one else was at all upset about anything I was saying. I was talking about buying a cd (investment vehicle). and I wanted other people's opinions.

not half listening this pissed him off and he decided I was ungrateful and stomped out. he couldn't even stay for dinner which was about 30 seconds from being served.

the day before that, I got lectured on praying my pain away and if i'd just believe in the LORD all would be perfect. this is basically saying to me my parents weren't good enough to live or I didn't pray for them hard enough and I am not wanting to hear that.

be a little grateful. break my heart.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

political thanksgiving

I just heard a woman giving thanksgiving tips. it involved place cards. how many people use place cards for their family thanksgiving? wth?

she advised separating people based on political views because what if someone wanted to discuss abortion. hello, I don't want to hear about any medical procedures during a meal. at that point, someone should just smack the person on the back of the head. I mean, gross. let's talk about gangrene! let's talk about colon cancer! wtf?

life sucks

my sister and brother were here today. I have two sisters and one brother. I am way younger than them. we aren't even of the same generation. they are baby boomers and I AM NOT.

my sisters cannot fucking enter a house I live in or see me without fucking insulting me. I am so sick of it. I have bit my tongue all these years because of so many reasons. they don't even fucking have a clue. they don't get how much I have tried to be nice. all I fucking want is for my own goddam family not to hate me and insult me and yell at me and make me feel like if I would just kill my loser ass self thee whole goddam world would be better.

they say they love me, but then they do this shit. I try so hard to be nice and it blows up in my face and then it gets to be my fault and it's all hedgehog dilemma because I do get bitchy and defensive.

to be fair, sometimes they do nice things but never, never, never can it just be that. never can I feel like I deserve anyone to give a fucking shit about me. it's always got some guilt attached.

we had to go through some of daddy's stuff. so as if that wasn't fucking bad enough.

then my sister is all "call (other sister) and tell her how mean I am and it will all be o.k." now they talk to each other EVERY FUCKING DAY and I know for a fact I am a huge subject of discussion. I talk to them about every two weeks. I am getting chewed out about half the timen but yes, they run back and forth and tattle even when I BARELY say anything.

I fucking hate this. I hate it.

I had a dream after I was finally left in peace where my sister was being a total bitch and I was trying to find something she would like and I was breaking things and crying trying to do this (this is a dream not real life). then she called me crazy and I don't remember except I started crying that I wanted to die and daddy was tell me "no! you can't do that" (i guess I was going to kill myself in the dream, I don't remember having anything that could do that, but it's a dream, so who knows).

then my other sister made us all go to the fucking bank without the key to the safety deposit box. no one would fucking listen to me that we needed it and my other sister took both keys (the bank wouldn't let me into it if I had 12 keys anyway). OF COURSE, the teller told them the same thing.

oh, but that was o.k. "now we know." if I had done that it would have been because I am crazy and because I "can't do the simplest things" and "can't manage money." doesn't every damn body know you need a fucking key to get into what daddy always called "the lock box."

there was a fucking thing about mortgages there and I joked about buying a house "with confidence." and I got a lecture like I really was going to suddenly out of goddam nowhere buy a fucking house. I mean wth? my sister was barging around the bank and my brother said "patience is a virtue" so I said "you can buy a home with confidence" (and pointed at the sign). wth? it's just a fucking joke. one of the goddam sample house payments is $1000/month. I KNOW I don't have that. years ago, when I had a good job, I considered buying a condo (i lived in a city then) and I couldn't even really afford that THEN. I haven't seriously considered buying property since. unless they mean THIS house which, yeah, it'd be great to own it, I guess. and, in theory, I only have to buy 3/4ths on it because I am part owner... but...

I don't feel like it's mine. I haven't since I was a little bitty girl and lived here with just mama and daddy. but I didn't know any better back then.

the other day, my sister (not the one who was here today) wanted to throw away a PIECE OF PAPER and I didn't want her to (it was something of daddy's) and she actually yelled at me "it's MY HOUSE TOO!!" wth? wth? it's not 12 goddam pink flamingos on the year it's a PIECE OF PAPER!!! AND I AM THE ONLY ONE LIVING HERE AND SEEING IT.

then she went thru the desk and threw out "junk mail" (her bitchy ass opinion) one item was the current schwan's book so I don't know wth else went out the door on her whim. it's long gone now.

I have finally hid one item that belonged to me that she picked up and pawed through every time she came here. I had put one thing in my father's room and my sister said "gross, what's THAT?" it was just some lip balm. but I said that because, for some reason, they think i've moved a million things into daddy's room. why would I do that? i'm not retarded. I know we have to go through everything.

she seemed to sort of randomly getting rid of stuff, so who knows what else is gone. it's too late now.

she grabbed some socks and was bitching they were "all balled up" well, they didn't used to be, but every time someone comes here they claw through daddy's stuff and I got sick of fixing it afterward. especially after daddy died. some of the socks were old and worn, but there were also new ones mixed in. they were all just either navy or black because duh, they belong to a man.

anyway, I guess if you have kids unless all you have is stuff easily divisible (like money) or you just have one kid.... don't do the whole "divide everything between my children" will. it stinks because there's only one way to divide somethings.

and we get along to a degree because it's not like my father was extrmely rich, so... but I think they found out from the insurance company that it's cheaper to insure and occupied house than an empty one, so for now I have a place to live. maybe for longer. I really don't know. daddy wanted me to be able to live here as long as I needed to, but... it's not like he's here to yell at all of us to behave ourselves.

sorry about this... but I haven't given any family members my url and they don't know I am shampoo.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

kurt cobain & Mind Kontrolle

poor kurt. now people are thinking he was a slave to the agency. I am not one of those people... or at least, i'll say overall no though there seems to be a time period (during his relationship with the horrid skank courtney love) where... possibly, to an extent. but if that's true, it appears he broke free of it before he was murdered.

oh yeah... he was murdered. check for details. has also done a few articles as well. the shampoo listed there is me. I was answering some questions raised the person who wrote one of their articles had. they decided to post it as an article.

there are many places online with information including tapes made by the private investigator courtney hired to (supposedly) find kurt. but not really, of course. because, boy, would kurt have been surprised to find out he was missing! he was living in his own house. I mean, wow, who'd think to look there? um, everybody did and skank kept sending them on wild goose chases.

I really don't know if courtney was working for anyone but herself. I think it is possible (based on things she and people who know her have said), but I don't know who (or what) it is or may have been.

mind control will be called "mk" to save me typing it out.

obviously, there is absolutely no way to know for sure if kurt was mk'd. even if every member of (or formerly with) the agency swore he was not, we still wouldn't know.

IF his body still existed, it might be possible to determine if he was abused in certain ways (i don't know...), but he was cremated with an amazing, mind-boggling, suspicion-inducing quickness and the skank claims someone "stole" what was left of his ashes (sigh, poor kurt, I hope whoever it was respectfully BURIED them).

mk is from a cia project called mkultra. it is a real thing that was brought before congress in the late 70s. a lot of people say the project continued either by a different agency or just under a different name (i don't know).

another important cia project to mkultra is project paperclip (which the cia admitted the true nature of in the early 90s). formerly, they'd just claimed to get nazi rocket scientists. now we know they got other types of scientists as well as high-ranking members of the nazi intelligence network (for their information on the u.s.s.r. supposedly). we weren't the only ones at nazi career day, so i'll give you a moment... yeah, it sucks.

all of this is not secret. the cia has admitted to various things over the years... sometimes because they didn't have any reason to continue keeping it secret, sometimes because they got caught... lots of reasons I don't know about.

if you want to know some of their past projects, they have a website. the goal of the site is to present the agency in a good light, but still. it'll give you some background.

various conspiracy sites have taken the mkultra thing and run with it. whole lists of celebrities are mk'd and all sorts of organizations have joined the party.

I don't know how (or if) this works in reality, but basically people are mk'd via various tortures... electroshock, physical pain, rape, food deprivation, water deprivation, sensory deprivation, isolation, systemic use of drug-induced states, etc. this causes the person to "disassociate" to the point they will form disassociative identity disorder (once called multiple personality disorder) which is a psychosis.

the trick in mk (allegedly) is they drive them crazy in such a specific way that they can then be "programmed" with various functions. some of these only come out when specifically called up by a "handler."

now, it may be possible to do this with some folks, but I would guess a lot of people will just go plain old ordinary crazy (and again, I mean psychotic, as in someone who will find if difficult to impossible to function in society.. being homeless and eating handouts might be too challenging for them). but I really don't know.

what I DO know is brainwashing (as it used to be called) is possible, but it requires unlimited access to a person while greatly restricting their access to people who aren't part of your agenda. some people are more susceptible than others, although drug use can make a person (temporarily) more malleable. but, this doesn't lead to anything as complicated as what people are talking about with mkultra. it will provide you with a person who willingly becomes one of the group and will take orders from the leader. of course, people talking about mk are usually talking about people whose "training" began in very early childhood (although, some adults are mk'd just through drugs, electroshock, etc.), so it's easy to imagine that systematically working with someone from age 2 would lead to more extreme results. but could that person function in society?

kurt has talked about a time after he got married to the skank (i think he actually called her "courtney") when he basically sat around the house using heroin. then, surprisingly (sarcasm), he got tired of this lifeplan and started to cut back on the narcotics and ... by what many people have said courtney encouraged kurt to use heroin as a way to make him more dependent on her. I don't think she actually introduced him to heroin. she certainly did not introduce him to narcotics.

he had used morphine before (he had a prescription) due to extreme stomach pain. his stomach pain was different from most people's and he really did need some heavy duty pain medication to be able to eat, etc.

I used to believe that perhaps this relentless pain caused him to commit suicide, but then I saw an interview where he talks about FINALLY being diagnosed and prescribed medication (a narcotic).

courtney made sure this medication along with all of kurt's guns were confiscated by police. so, is it any wonder that kurt had a bad attitude about the "intervention" where they threatened to fire him from the label because he was using heroin. courtney knew that without his prescription, kurt would start using heroin again.

wait, what about mk? exactly. he sounds a little ornery for someone who is only acting as per his programmer's orders, doesn't he? there are many witnesses to all of this.

the kurt was mk'd people don't really know much about kurt or his music. they say he was used to create "grunge" and encourage apathy. first, kurt did not come up with the name "grunge." second, listen to nirvana, then listen to some other bands from the same time period, exactly. third, the crap (e.g. poison) that was already popular (holding over from the late 80s) encouraged apathy as well as just plain not thinking.

then we have kurt's death versus michael jackson's death. kurt was reviled, character assassinated, and turned into another person as soon as he couldn't speak for himself. in life, he was not a danger to children or anyone else. michael jackson raped countless little boys. yet, we have tribute upon tribute to michael.

after kurt died, nirvana was over. there have been a couple of things released since then, but no one who was IN nirvana tried to capitalize off of it. a good thing because nirvana got dragged down with kurt's character assassination.
michael's whole family has something planned to use him to advanced their own careers. although possibly not his sisters... if kurt got character assassinated, michael got the opposite and has become an hero.

so, if kurt was mk'd I think it was after he got famous and their goal was to get him to just sit around doing nothing until the public lost interest in him.

because it wasn't kurt's music that made people apathetic. it was the awful way he was treated after he died. they may as well have come on tv and said, "look who's finally dead. well, fuck him and fuck you, too." I honestly have never seen anything like it before or since.

I listened to alternative music years before nirvana, but I really loved them. I thought kurt was funny and sarcastic. his interviews were always interesting and sometimes really funny. I still miss him. he would call people out on their ridiculousness and make fun of himself for his own. it was great.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

shocking pop (snicker)

they are still going on about the adam lambert "controversy." I have two words: dress rehearsal.

I didn't watch the amas because award shows suck. I have seen a snippet from adam's performance. what I see is a LOT of people on stage who would all be falling over each other if they hadn't rehearsed.

so, the tv people knew what adam would do. if they actually had any problem with it, they had a chance to make him change it. since this only occupies a few seconds of his performance, he easily could have made the changes and kept his overall performance.

this got on tv because it was supposed to... granted, with a larger audience everyone may have performed with more enthusiasm, it would still be basically the same thing.

what I saw wasn't very entertaining. it seemed rushed. bleat a few words, pose, bleat, do controversial thing, bleat, pose, controversial thing, etc. the kissing (a "man") was the best part because that means it's over and my ears and eyes are glad.

now, they've dragged lady gaga into it... she gets away with it. blah, blah. who cares? why are people even listening to this crap?

Sunday, November 22, 2009

shaniya davis, her mom & mario macneill

10-03-09 bradley lockhart left for a job in portland, oregon. he frequently spent time out of town due to his work as a building contractor. in fact, he did not return to fayetteville until shaniya went missing.

about a month before bradley left town, antoinette started calling him and telling him that she'd changed. she had a job, she wasn't using drugs, she wanted to be a mom to shaniya. these fairytales sounded convincing enough over long distance that a week after bradley leaving town, she'd gotten her hands on shaniya.

not only were drugs being done at 1116A sleepy hollow drive, they'd even been sold there. frequent visitor (and boyfriend to brenda davis) mario andrette macneill was a drug dealer.

antoinette and brenda both needed money. antoinette owed mario a drug debt (or so he says) and brenda owed back rent. this isn't an accusation against brenda, but simply to show that antoinette's situation was not the way she'd described it.

antoinette's boyfriend was 30-year-old clarence coe. interestingly, he says he did not really know macneill. does this mean that macneill avoided coe?

coe claims that shaniya called him, "daddy." I don't know that much about coe, so I don't know if he should be believed or not. he also said that he'd never seen shaniya sleeping in the living room. he added, "educated people, figure it out."

the baby antoinette is carrying belongs to coe. he did not live with her.

mario macneill (d.o.b. 4/30/1980) was born under a full moon. the websleuths astrologers say, "self gratification is his all." maybe that was why he was smirking in his mugshot. he knew people all over the world would see it.

the car that the police took 11 bags of evidence from is mario's mitsubishi galant. he owns a total of five cars. he let brenda and antoinette use at least one of these vehicles.

given what macneill did in june 2001, it's surprising he was not in prison. he shot someone in the face, shoulder, and arm. two other people were injured in this shooting. macneill was released from custody to await his trial. about a year later, he's arrested for drug posession. he goes on trial for the triple shooting and the drugs and is given 40-50 months on probation.

it only takes him a couple of months to be arrested again for drug possession. after this, he is sent to prison in october 2003. he's released in may 2006.

he is due to appear in court on 12-02-09. he is currently being held without bond. perhaps macneill will finally be locked away from law-abiding citizens.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

shaniya davis, funeral sunday

shaniya davis's funeral will be sunday 11-22-09 at 3 p.m. services will be at manna church located at 5117 cliffdale road in fayetteville, nc 28314. the family is allowing the public to pay their respects.

a memorial fund has been set up at wachovia bank under the name shaniya nicole davis. the bank is located at 4200 morganton rd. in fayetteville, nc 28314. the phone # is (910) 868-0837.

rest in peace, shaniya.

shaniya davis & the coleman family

11 years ago bradley lockhart's wife of 7 years, vickie sue coleman lockhart, was murdered. they had 3 children byron III (now 20-21... i've heard both ages... named for his grandfather), cheyenne (now 17), and chivas (now 13). these children have been raised by the colemans.

when mr. coleman heard about shaniya being sent to antoinette's, he offered to take her in permanently. he didn't want her around "the drug people." the colemans are a black family, so he would not have been holding antoinette's race against her.

when shaniya went missing, her grandfather and her 13-year-old half-brother searched for her. the colemans lost two daughters to murder.
when 28-year-old vickie sue was murdered on 3-3-98 her sister channel coleman (age 19) was with her. vickie sue, channel, and 24-year-old david lee epps were all bound, gagged and shot with a shot gun. two other victims thorsten malin and tyrone parker (both 21) survived the home invasion robbery that took place in the graham road duplex at 1 a.m.

vincent lee thomas and litdel burkhalter were convicted of this attack. both are in prison.

Friday, November 20, 2009

shaniya nicole davis, a princess

on 11-10-09, the world became aware of beautiful five-year-old shaniya davis when police in fayetteville, north carolina issued an amber alert. at 6:53 a.m. her mother, antoinette nicole davis, reported her missing saying she wandered off from 1116A sleepy hollow drive. she claims she last saw shaniya at 5:30 a.m. when she put shaniya on the couch. she says shaniya was wearing a blue sleep shirt and pink panties. shaniya is 3 feet (91 cm) tall and weighs 40 lbs. (18 kg). she has curly dark brown hair, brown eyes, and a scar on her left foot. she is mixed race. her mother is black and her father is white. she's a very pretty little girl with a light-up-the room smile.

police will later find that shaniya had only lived at this address since 10-10-09 even though her mother has lived there 6 months. a lunar month and a day later, shaniya is gone. and not back to her aunt carey lockhart-davis (a different davis) or her father bradley lockhart or any of her other caretakers in the upper middle class community she usually called home.
her father had her aunt take her to antoinette's "for the weekend." when carey tries to take shaniya back home, her mother won't let her go. the aunt doesn't have custody and bradley lockhart is away. he's a building contractor, then working in oregon (though he lives in fayetteville, n.c.). friends (the allens) visit shaniya and see cigarette burns on her arms. she says, "mommy's friends did it." I don't know if anyone passed this information to her father, but shockingly, no one calls the police. possibly they fear she'll just be placed in foster care? I don't know...

using dogs, the police quickly determined that shaniya did not walk out of the mobile home at 1116A sleepy hollow drive. yet 30-40 volunteers searched the area using dogs, helicopters, searching neighbors' cars and going door to door. the police find feces on the front porch railing.

next door, ms. moore tells them that she heard noises from antoinette's trailer at 3 a.m. she also saw someone put something in her trashcan. she identifies the feces-cover blanket the officers find as belonging to shaniya.

she may have been one of the people who let police know that antoinette's boyfriend clarence coe took care of shaniya more than her mother. antoinette accuses coe who is arrested 11-11-09 aand released 11-13-09. he has an alibi. he was babysitting his nephew somewhere else. witnesses confirm this.

antoinette has a 7 year old son. when police were called for shaniya, this son was taken from her. there had been child abuse complaints against before and the police see the trailer is, as the landlady says, "a pigsty." it is roped off as a crime scene.

brenda davis, antoinette's sister, also lived in the trailer with her 2-year-old child. she has since been evicted (11-19-09) for not paying rent. she and her mother, ann summers, are the only ones who say antoinette loved shaniya. brenda has a boyfriend, mario andrette macneill.

the amber alert turns up a video surveillance photo of mario carrying shaniya. it was taken at the elevator of comfort suites in sanford, n.c. at 6:11 a.m. on 11-10-09. this is 42 minutes before antoinette calls 911. shaniya appears to be wearing a dress. mario is also carrying something with black and white checks. at 7:30 a.m., mario and shaniya leave the hotel. it's known she's still alive at this point, but it's suspected she is now in worse shape physically than at 6:11. at this time, the amber alert is only 37 minutes long. no one on the scene knows shaniya shouldn't be with mario. the police say they have a person of interest, a 60-year-old man in a blue toyota.

shaniya's body is found, clad only in a t-shirt, on 11-16-09. she is found 100 feet off walker road (33 yards?) across the street from carolina trace, a gated community. she is laying among some deer carcasses (in black plastic trash bags). this location is 6-7 miles from comfort suites. it's on the lee-harnett county line, but on the lee side (shaniya lived in cumberland county). interesting as shaniya's last name could easily have been lockhart. hart means deer. jeff riccio of tarheel canine training inc. found shaniya. he says, "it was nothing anyone wanted to see."

the media have assumed the deer have been left by hunters. I DOUBT it. first, this location is too close to the road and houses to safely hunt. second, I have NEVER heard of a hunter doing such a thing. EVERY hunter I know would take the deer out of the woods. even rich hunters usually aren't so wasteful. they will take the deer to the slaughterhouse to be properly cut up (they will have already field dressed the animal after killing it) and they donate the meat to charity. in my state, leaving a deer like that will get you arrested. also, there are strict bag limits on deer. even if a particularly horrible person goes hunting... why the garbage bags? that's just weird. deer are big animals and a lazy wasteful person would just leave them, not drag them somewhere in a garbage bag.

mario andrette macneill, age 29, turned himself in before shaniya was found. 11 bags of evidence has been taken from his car. on 11-19-09 he's charged with 1st degree murder and 1st degree rape of a child.

antoinette davis was arrested 11-14-09. in court on 11-15-09 her bond was set at $51,000. before shaniya was found, antoinette was charged with human trafficking and felony child abuse including prostitution. additional charges are expected.

grief counselors and chaplains have been called in to work with investigators. these men have 15 and 22 1/2 years in l.e. they've seen murder victims. this case is EXTREMELY bad. the investigation continues...

I have more to post on this. shaniya's photos make one think of a sweet little princess. some very horrible people defiled her. why?

Sunday, November 15, 2009

another wonderful life

well, folks, I have a dog, a cat, three cows, one bull, a horse, two ducks, and three chickens. we live on a happy little farm and i'm friends with the local sprites. of course, I am talking about harvest moon for gamecube! yay!

I found out about the coolest cheat. you plug your controller into the 3rd slot and press the z button numerous times. if you have a game cube. you have to be in the regular game, not paused or conversating (fox) and you get maaany cool items. BE SURE AND PUT THINGS YOU WANT TO KEEP ON THE SHELF OR IN THE COOLER as this cheat overwrites your inventory. and try to refrain from making yourself the richest farmer EVAH because after a while the game decides you have no gold and I don't know if you can change its mind. but i'm soldiering on in my "I like bears" outfit and pink shoes.

it's too bad you can't get people to pay you for picking flowers irl. well, hey, some people probably do get paid for that, but they are near more interesting flowers than me.

irl meanwhile, I have to clean this house and deal with my siblings. this is not as fun as feeding imaginary cows, I can tell you. although, real bunnies are the best critters ever! yay, bunnies.

Friday, November 13, 2009


I am so missing my kickass satellite package daddy had us signed up on... even though MOST of the time he controlled the remote and he had a fondness for news, old-fashioned gospel music, westerns of all eras, and "hanna montana."

well, if they still made sitcoms, maybe he wouldn't have started watching the disney channel. and that is 100 percent my fault.

my nephew and niece-in-law arrived and they have three little girls. well, daddy was watching the news and it was discussing something that involved many people dying (this war we're in probably). so, panicked, I turned it on "hanna montana."

and, I have to say, if a person doesn't like reality shows or game shows... well, there is at least a story to it. also, his hearing wasn't that great any more so miley's singing didn't bother him. I heard one of her songs the other day and, I swear, I thought it was billy ray. seriously.

she sounds just like him. supposedly, she's not his biological daughter, but I don't know about that.

(sigh) I miss my father.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

tommygirl, tommygirl, tommygirl

well, tom cruise is working on finding a sexy movie for himself and katiebot to co-star. why would he do this?

granted "days of thunder" (which I have not seen, but people say...) and "far and away" were fairy successful forays with nicole kidman. but then there was "eyes wide shut". this was a good movie, don't get me wrong. but i'm not sure it really fulfilled tommygirl's agenda.

so, proving he's a movie-picking genius, he is thinking about remaking "last tango in paris" with katie. what?

first, this is not a movie that needs remaking. there's just no reason for it.

some people think it's dated, but those same people would want real sex (i'm getting this from articles they've written). are tomkat sure they want to go there?

well, I suppose they could do the movie all in english instead of a mix of french and english (the french is subtitled in english). I suppose that would be different.

but, does tommygirl realize there's a difference between a movie with a lot of sex in it and a sexy movie?

basically, i'm finding out a lot of odd things as I prepare my "last tango in paris" post. haha

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

kstew n rpatt: brando fans?!

well, "brando" is misleading. actually, their favorite movie is "last tango in paris". they (cough) "bonded" due to this. hehehehe

ok. I am working on a post about that very movie. I can tell you, marlon brando throws down hardcore with the acting. not that everyone notices that because his costar is mostly naked and there is a lot of sex.

oh yes, BACK ON TOPIC... wtf do kstew and rpatt learn from brando? it just boggles the mind. they can't be trying to learn how to act, can they?

all I can say is start with someone easier. I don't think marlon brando's style can really be learned. I think you kind of have to be him.

fortunately, I think they're just getting sex idea. or maybe they're learning french.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

atonement or not...

right after my previous post about the movie "atonement" I checked the internet to find out what I missed. perhaps seeing it in the movie wouldn't be such a let down as reading it, but here goes...

SPOILER WARNING! if, for some reason, you desire to see the movie "atonement" be advised: spoilers. also, I did check multiple sources, but I can't say of everything that I "sarw" it with my own eyes.

o.k., so here's the thing. there's no atonement in this movie. I haven't read the book so perhaps some atonement happens in it. if not, wtf? did someone just think this was a neat sounding word?

basically, there's a rich family. when the housekeeper's husband ran off, the rich folks educated her son. his name is robbie and he wants to be a doctor.

the rich people have a son (oldest), a chain-smoking college coed daughter (robbie's love interest), and a daughter who's 12 or so and fancies herself a writer.

they also have houseguests. a sleazy college buddy of the son. their three red-haired cousins have arrived to weather the scandal of their parents' divorce. so, two bratty boys and their catty 15-year-old sister.

so our snoopy writer first sees her sister and robbie out by the fountain. to her, it appears that robbie somehow made sis strip down to her slip and go into the fountain before she leaves. a very strange thing to do and, of course, not really what happened. the sister did all that on her own and was only annoyed that a vase got broken.

then robbie writes to apologize. he indulges hs lustful fantasies before scrawling out his apology and, naturally, he puts the wrong letter in the envelope. then he gets the snoop the deliver it. too late, he realizes what he gave her. his letter worked wonders on the sister who promptly sexes him up in the library.

alas, the older sister failed to do damage control about the letter and she also fails to lock the door. so, the snoop is figuring robbie is a sex maniac.

then, the bratty twins are found to have run away. the household turns out to shine flashlights into the darkness and yell the boys' names.

the snoop wandering about on her own comes across a shocking scene. some man doing someTHING to the girl cousin. the girl cousin claims she doesn't know who it was, but the snoop is positive it was robbie.

so police are summoned, the snoop swears out testimony, the older sister says not to believe her and takes a long smokebreak, then the snoop presents the LETTER as evidence. meanwhile, the the sleazy male houseguest takes a post rape snooze. no one finds his behavior odd.

when robbie shows up with the twins (having cleverly searched somewhere other than the front yard), he's immediately arrested and dragged off to jail.

years pass and england gets involved in the beginnings of world war ii. both sisters (separately) spend some time in the nursing program. but somehow for the snoop this is a bigger deal because she "gave up her place at cambridge to do something practical." (yes, no one else has ever given anything up because of a huge, massive war.)

and then nothing until after 20 best sellers, she writes about this incident. it's something like 1999. her sister and robbie both died during the war. by this time, practically everyone they ever knew has died. and miss snoop, with one foot in the grave, writes a book explaining to no one in particular that robbie was innocent all along. she even has found out that her cousin is marrying the sleazy rapist.

she made up the scene where she told the truth so robbie and her sister would have "the happy ending they never got." even though it meant he died with a rape conviction to his name and she died estranged for her family for what they did to robbie.

so, what is the point we're supposed to get anyway?