guess who is in vogue...

so, emilie de ravin and rpattz are in vogue promoting their movie. but their interview is only half a page. so, tortured-by-fame rpattz only managed to mention show ponies, crawling under the table, and the fact twitter lets his fans track him like prey. bwahaha well, he may have a point by twitter.

I don't really understand the kind of fan that tries to chase down someone. i've seen famous people before, so it's not like I have no idea. you can restrain yourself, seriously.

mr. whiney and old frying pan face

that would be john mayer and robert pattinson, respectively. they need to start dating each other immediately because I have read two douchey interviews this week.

I mentioned something about rpattz in my previous post. I had forgotten all about him saying elephants purr and it sounds like a velicoraptor.

yes, he knows what a fucking dinosaur sounds like. that's the kind of brains you can have when you stay away from ICKY GIRLS!

all I can say is the many "twihard" guys (this surely includes many, many gays) PLEASE HIT ON HIM so he will stop dropping these anvil-like hints. apparently the only "twihards" bold enough to hit on him are ICKY GIRLS (and their moms).

he cannot BE around those THINGS WE HAVE. (perish the thought!) so, put on your glitter and go for it twibois (or whatever gay male twilight fans of legal age call themselves)!

now, I don't blame him for maybe feeling uncomfortable at the photoshoot. but, the part of the interview my phone allowed me to read was clearly done at a different time. actually, there was more than one meeting for this tiresome thing.

meanwhile, john mayer decided to show us how racially aware he is by using THE WORD. he's been bawling and squalling ever since. he sowwy. he didn't mean it like that (uh, I read the whole interview... I don't know how else he meant it despite what he babbles).

he acts like he just got the memo that a lot of people don't like THE WORD and do not wish to read it, see it, hear it, or listen to you sniffling it. yeah, that's news.

john, you fucking moron, no one has EVER liked THE WORD. even back in slave days it was a bad word to say. so, you said a word some people who OWNED SLAVES wouldn't say... geez dude, pull your head out of your ass and look around once in a while.

he also invoked the name of david duke. now, I haven't heard about david duke is a good while. I really had forgotten all about him... apparently john mayer hasn't. and david duke is the reason black women are safe from john mayer's stds ... or something like that.

but, back to the word... that was tossed out when they asked him about his "hood pass" (formerly? known as a ghetto pass). o.k., a "hood" and a "ghetto" aren't the same, so??? and he says what people really mean is a "n--- pass". er, no they don't.

hood and ghetto are both PLACES. places and people aren't the same even if people do live in places and places often have people living in them.

but let's just overlook that for a second and wonder why playboy would ask john mayer about his "hood pass". before this interview, did a lot of black people like john mayer?

oh snapple!

dr. dre is suing suge knight! omg! well, hopefully dr. dre is at an undisclosed location and letting his lawyers do the dirty work. I don't know or care why. rich people moving money around is all's I know.

but remember when vanilla ica shrilled that suge knight have dangled him off a balcony? later he retracted that. probably because dangling people off balconies was a direct violation of suge's probation. hehe, but still... funny story.

which brings me to my most favorite funny story ever which is tommy hilfigger beating down that bitch axl rose. in public, so there were no takebacksees. ah yes, fashion designers are FIERCE!

further proving this was jay mccarroll beating all the boys which includes sebastian bach, kfed, and bobby brown(*) at the tower on harvey's obstacle course. (*) bobby is afraid of heights. he tried, the other two didn't really. o.k. s.b. is the main one I don't like because hair metal sucks. always and forever, it must be beaten back. remember the darkness scare of a few years ago?

speaking of things that suck, rpattz has opined to details magazine. first, he has to pose with ICKY GIRLS (not really, just naked). he said he was "allergic to vagina" several times.
then he talked a lot about his (unnatural) love of animals. he told a very long story about a lovely elephant lady who loved him once. she was a single mother.

finally, by the writer's description, dude is on drugs. or he needs to see a doctor, stat.

on the brightside, i'm sure he had NO PROBLEM with the glittery scenes. haha (still haven't see either twilight movie).

kstew n rpatt: brando fans?!

well, "brando" is misleading. actually, their favorite movie is "last tango in paris". they (cough) "bonded" due to this. hehehehe

ok. I am working on a post about that very movie. I can tell you, marlon brando throws down hardcore with the acting. not that everyone notices that because his costar is mostly naked and there is a lot of sex.

oh yes, BACK ON TOPIC... wtf do kstew and rpatt learn from brando? it just boggles the mind. they can't be trying to learn how to act, can they?

all I can say is start with someone easier. I don't think marlon brando's style can really be learned. I think you kind of have to be him.

fortunately, I think they're just getting sex idea. or maybe they're learning french.