Friday, September 19, 2014

Goodbye Tropical Storms

Tropical Storms was Briar Storms a.k.a. Briar Theelsmom. She was a wonderful person who put her own life in danger to help animals. She put an end to the barbaric practice of using rabbits (REAL rabbits) at greyhound races. She also was part of an investigation that made dog fighting a felony in all fifty states.

I knew her online only. She was really a great person. She did not talk about herself that much so few people online knew she was sick. I didn't know. So, I was absolutely shocked to learn she had died.

Rest in peace, Tropical Storms. You will be missed so, so much. Thank you for all your work for animals, especially rabbits.

FANFIC: Mrs. Wendy Hamburgerlar

disclaimer! I do not own Wendy's, McDonald's, Burger King or any of their respective copyrights, trademarks, logotypes or patents.

 Dave and Wendy Thomas are real people. This fic is not about them AT ALL.
Wendy Thomas and her father Dave Thomas. Real people connected to the actual Wendy's restaurant. This fanfic is not about them. Did you know Dave Thomas was a veteran of the Korean War?  Well, he was.
Here is another important thing to know about Wendy's. They have changed their logo. The original logo was based on a photo of Wendy Thomas taken when she was eight years old. The new logo is supposed to look older. IDK if it is still supposed to look like Wendy Thomas at all, maybe. But, here are the logos.

 Now for McDonald's logos. It has been a long time since there has been any connection to a family and the restaurant. So, I'll include some of their characters.

And since Burger King gets mentioned, here's their logo.

O.k., further disclaimer... I don't like hamburgers all that much, so I don't have strong feelings about the burgers offered by these restaurants. To each their own.


Hi. My name is Wendy and I am a ginger. Maybe you've eaten in my dad's restaurants. He's really great at making burgers and at business. Since I love my dad and I love burgers, that's great. I spend a lot of time there. It's called Wendy's. (Surprise.)

But, we're not the only burger joint on the block. One of our main competitors is allegedly run by this clown named Ronald. Ronald McDonald. Hey, here's some insider info... the clown has nothing to do with the burger. Crazy, I know. I think he's the brother in law of the guy who makes the burgers, but I've never asked.

For some reason, McDonald's has this weird fan club going with all kinds of chracters. They're probably just friends of Ronald's now that I think about. All I know is there are quite a few of them. I see them around. Being in the trade, I even met a few.

But, there was one mysterious figure that caught my eye. I have to say, I was intrigued.

About all I knew about him was he really, really loves hamburgers. He loves them enough to risk his neck to eat them. He's the bad boy of McDonald's.

The trick was meeting him. He was fast on his feet and didn't let the grass grow under him. But, I knew his weakness. And I had a not-so-secret weapon: our burgers are better than McDonald's.

We met on neutral turf. The Burger King parking lot. The King himself presided. Nice guy, a little too old for me.

We hung around, all of us, for hours until he showed up. Ronald was juggling flaming apple pies and everyone except me was staring at the pies.

I saw him the minute he came in and he saw me. Not breaking eye contact for even a second, he walked straight to me.

"I heard you were askin' about me," were the first words he ever spoke to me.

"Maybe," I replied.

"Maybe nothing," he told me. "You," he pointed at me, "have been asking about me," he pointed at himself.

I tried for cool, but my cheeks were aflame--and nobody shows a blush like a ginger. So, I just shrugged.

"Let's get out of here," he said. He turned and walked away. He didn't check to see if I was following, but I was. I was right behind him.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

FANFIC: Shorca

In response to a request that I create a crossover fanfic between Jaws and Orca: The Killer Whale focusing on a relationship between the shark from Jaws and the main orca from Orca: The Killer Whale, I present this little work offanfiction. I do not own Jaws nor do I own Orca: The Killer Whale. I am making no money off this piece work. The two whale swam together, leaping in unison. Even humans could tell they were a pair. Those of a more romantic frame of mind might even say they were in love. Although few people knew it, whales lived about as long as humans. What was known was that whales traveled in family/social groups known as 'pods'. It was suspected by a few scholars that whales mated for life. Neptune and Persephone fell in love gradually. But when they committed to one another completely, their love was inspirational among all sea mammals. The entire pod was awaiting the birth of their calf. A fisherman had come to realize that catching even one orca could bring him more money than an entire season of regular fishing. He began to study orcas. Neptune and Persephone caught his eye. One fateful day he managed to catch Persephone. In her pain and fear, she miscarried her calf. The fisherman cut her down, but it was too late.
Neptune pushed his bride to the beach and he mourned. Then, he sought bloody vengeance upon the hapless fools that tore her from his side. His long hunt completed, he slipped back into the icy depths and returned to his pod. Yet, as the seasons passed, he became more acutely aware of her absence. The other whales' gentle attempts at consoling him only made him lonelier. He began to swim a little outside the pod where he could be alone with his memories. He knew this was wrong of him. The summer he finally took a break from his family pod--the first break since his revenge on Persephone's murderer--a shark became big news in the ocean. She seemingly had declared war on a touristy coastal town. When Neptune finally caught up to the shark, he was truly amazed. She was the largest shark he'd ever seen. She wasmenancing the humans in a way he hadn't seen since his own vendetta. He waited until after she finished laying waste to a boat serendipitously named ORCA. Neptune was a bit nervous. He'd eaten a few sharks, but never really talked to one. Charmingly, this one was named Megan. "Did these humans incur your wrath?" Neptune enquired. "What? Well, they kept throwing barrels at me, but other than that.. no..." Megan replied. "Not only these on the boat, but the ones in town?" Neptune pressed for more details. "Oh... them," Megan swam past once, twice, three times. "I guess I don't have anything against them." "But...but... you've been eating them all summer. It's the talk of this side of the ocean." "Really?" a trace of pride crept into Megan's voice. "I had no idea! I've been so busy." "Truly," Neptune replied. "Oh, well. I was just hungry. I kind of eat lots," said Megan, snagging a passing fish. "Oh, sorry. Did you want toeat him?" She continued to swim. "No, I'm good," replied Neptune. Megan stopped swimming for a split second. "You're not going to eat ME are you?" Neptune surfaced, laughed, took a deep breath, then resubmerged. "No. I'm not going to eat you, Noble Shark. I, too, have killed many humans." "Really?" Megan sounded intrigued. "I didn't think you guys--I mean orcas--did that." "They're not our preferred diet, no," said Neptune. "But, you did eat them?" asked Megan. "Some of them," replied Neptune. "Some of them were not worth eating." "Too skinny or wearing too many clothes?" asked Megan. "Well, I guess a little of both, but I didn't think about it at the time," replied Neptune. "Sounds like this was in the winter, then," said Megan. "summer makes humans taste totally different." "It does?" Neptune was interested despite himself. "Oh, yes!" Megan was still swimming. "They put delicious oil on themselves. It makes them slide down much easier, too." "You don't say..." replied Neptune. Though he was a bit skeptical. He'd seen oil. it was nasty. "Not the oil like the ships are always spilling," said Megan, sensing his thoughts. "Ugh. I mean, I might still eat them, but that doesn't sound good. No, this oil tastes like coconus." "Coconuts?" asked Neptune. "Oh, I forgot. You tend to stay in cold waters, don't you?" "Yes, that's true," allowed Neptune. "Well, coconuts are these round plant things. They don't look very good, to be honest. But, I'll try anything once," Megan giggled and ate two more fish. "turns out, they taste good." "Why are all these fish even swimming near us?" asked Neptune, eating one so Megan wouldn't feel awkward. "They're curious," replied Megan. "About what?" "Why, what we're talking about, naturally." "Is that so fascinating to fishkind?" asked Neptune. "Well, maybe," said Megan. "If we both stay in these waters." "I see." "Hey!" said Megan, swimming faster in her excitement. "I have a great idea!" "Does it involve coconuts?" asked Neptune. "It does!" exclaimed Megan. "Why don't you try some summer humans?" "They're really that different?" "You tell me," called Megan as she began to swim toward Anity Beach. Pausing to take another deep breath, Neptune followed her. It is a testament to the human species' determinaation to forget important events that any humans ever swam in the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of North America after the first day Megan and Neptune spent together. It turns out, Megan was right. Coconut suntan oil does greatly improve the taste of humans and everyone on Amity Beach seems to have slathered themselves with the stuff immediately before going in to the water. At first, people didn't know what to think when they saw the tall, black dorsal fin of a full-grown male orca beingcircled by the distinctive fin of a shark. Some people thought it had to be a prank. Orcas and sharks didn't travel together and neither seemed to be attacking the other. The previous days in Amity had taught Megan well. She picked off her first couple of humans far from the beach. She did it quickly, so they'd have no time to panic and warn the other prey. She was just about to swallow her third humans when Neptune grabbed the other endmof the same person. They stopped when they bumped noses. It was the best tasting human Megan had ever consumed. "Sorry," said Neptune. "I just wanted to try one." "oh," Megan would have blushed if she could have. "Don't apologize. I got carried away and just started eating people. I forgot to save any for you." "That's quite all right," said Neptune. "I believe there are at least a few more humans we could try. "Oh, good," said Megan with much sincerity. "I eat kind of a lot, you know." "Yes, I understand. I have a robust appetite myself," replied Neptune. then he added, "And you're quite right. Summer does make humans taste better." After their feast, Megan and Neptune swam back into the open sea. Megan continued to munch on fish near constantly while Neptune told her about Persephone. And why he'd attacked and killed so many humans. megan said that if she could cry, this would make her cry. Since she could not cry, she promised to eat extra humans as revenge for Persephone. The next day, Neptune convinced her to try another beach. He was beginning to feel protective of her and he knew humans could dole out punishment if you ate enough of them. Before he knew it, summer was over. "I would usually go to warmer water now," Megan said one day. "But, I don't want to go." "Why not, darling Megan?" asked Neptune. "Well, this is warm water for you--right?" she asked. "It is," replied Neptune. "But, it is becoming colder. We could go further south and find water that is about the same temperature as it was here when I arrived." "Oh, what a wonderful idea!" Megan swam in quick, happy circles. "It might not be quite as far south as you usually go," cautiond Neptune. "As long as I'm with you, I'll be warm," replied Megan. So, they swam south together, the orca and the shark, to feast of humans, fish, and anything else that looked tasty.

Sunday, August 31, 2014

If you can't beat them....

I have an idea... a fanfic challenge. give me your ridiculous pairings, and i will endeavor to fic them. i haven't seen/read everything so maybe put in more than one choice? i already have a request for Elsa (Frozen) and Minako (Sailor Moon). um. these won't be hentai. a restriction or two... no incest, no pedo weirdness. otherwise, any crazy combo will do. i read a lot and watch lotsof movies, so i might know your character.

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Fan Pairings: OMG! People Scare Me!

Did you know that Hermione Granger and Severus Snape was... a thing? Well, now you know. You're welcome. That's just one of about 50 WTF pairings I could list in two seconds. O.K., let's see... maybe I could see that. They're both literate. Of course, he goes from being her teacher to being (spoiler) dead. Like there's not much interval in between those things. I'm imagining Hermione bring old Sev home to Mum and Dad Muggle. What parent doesn't want their daughter to marry a grumpy old wizard? LOL But, hey, at least they're in the same series. And they have MET...when she was eleven... BUT, she is 18 at the end of the series. I'm pretty sure fandom has gotten to the point where all characters from everything are put into a hat and some names get drawn out.. usually two, but sometimes more.. and coupledom strikes a fanfic author. Real authors, BEWARE.

Sunday, August 3, 2014

the killing room, no matter what they tell you it's for.. never volunteer for a study

this movie outright tells you at the beginning it's based on the mk ultra experiments. as far as i know, there wasn't an experiment EXACTLY like this. but, then the movie does not pretend to cover the original projects, but perhaps an mk ultra III or mk ultra IV (mk ultra II is probably done by now... technically). although we have evidence to support mk ultra II, as far as i know, no one knows anything for sure after that. but, that's the basis from which this movie is drawn. if you know anything about some of these so-called "experiments" human rights take a poor second to achieving whatever goal the "experimenters" are after. but, EVEN KNOWING THAT, some of the events of the movie are quite surprising.

the movie begins with emily reilly (chloe sevingy) going to a job interview in a non-descript building like you might see in any industrial park in the u.s. she's carrying with her a report of facial expressions in regard to lying.

a personal aside, they did some of this at my college and i saw the videos from it. what they did there, was no big deal really... just people lying in front of the camera. well, that's all i know about it anyway. i didn't know any of the participants. even though i had a psychology minor and took several electives in psychology (mostly social, industrial, and behavior modification), this sort of thing was restricted to people who were much more involved in the department than i was. so, i knew a little bit of what ms. reilly would be saying... at first.

so, ms. reilly is greeted by dr. phillips (peter stomare). she tells him she admires his worth and begins talking about some experiment that sounds a little like some real experiments (maybe the stanford prison experiment which, i believe, was zimbardo in real life). of course, this experiment took place in the 1970s, but it is most likely still studied today. (this experiment is famous, but here goes: a fake prison was created and students were divided in between guards and inmates... the experiment had to be ended early because the students took their roles all too seriously. i think it was only scheduled to run a week, maybe two. looking back on it, there may have been more to that experiment than was stated when i studied it for it to run amok so quickly.) all this is irrelevent to the movie except to establish this dr. phillips is someone ms. reilly (i honestly can't remember if she's a ph.D. or just has a master's degree) respects academically.

they chitchat about ms. reilly's lying study and dr. phillips asks her if she can tell if people are lying to her. she says she can. he says, "my name is not dr. phillips." we don't get a verdict from emily, but i think it's safe to say he is telling the truth. that being said, i believe he is the person known as dr. phillips, but that is not his true identity. i don't know what emily thought at this point... she doesn't leave at any rate.

the interview is pretty brief. a lot of it consists of him emphasizing to her that everything must be held in strictest confidence. she signs papers agreeing to this. then he tells her about a tape that he wants her to watch. he doesn't tell her what's ON it exactly. but, he makes it perfectly clear that "this tape does not exist." soon after she begins watching the tape she asks him when it was made. he does not need to answser this question.

the tape shows some volunteers arriving for a study. they arrive one at a time after some sort of processing by a woman dressed in a manner that would suggest a nurse. they are escorted into a plain white room and they have very long surveys they've been told to complete.

the first person to arrive is a friendly young woman named kerry isalano (clea duvall). she takes a seat at the long table in the room. at the chair futherest from the door (but not the chair at the end) with her back to the door. everyone who enters the room after this takes their seat relative to where she is seated. a voice on the tape tells emily that kerry is married and has no criminal record.

she is joined by tony mazzolla (shea whigham) who takes a seat at the opposite end of the table, facing the door. when kerry asks the nurse for a new pencil because she broke hers, he at first thinks she's addressing him. tony then uses his cell phone to call and leave a message for his girlfriend that he'll be home late.

then crawford haines (timothy hutton) strides confidently into the room. he takes a seat across from tony. both kerry and tony know that crawford has done studies before. while kerry puzzles over questions, crawford quickly checks them off (the questions on this survey are crazy such as "which would you cancel: christmas, easter, 4th of july" and "in a shipwreck who would you save: yourself, them, no one"... we see crawford fill in the box saying he'd save himself). crawford, born in 1965, is the oldest participant and the only one with a criminal record.

emily pipes up to dr. phillips that crawford's ease with the situation is a "sign of contempt" and that's not good for intergroup relationships. he tells her that's not what they're trying to find out with this experiment.

the fourth and final study "volunteer" paul brodie (nick cannon) enters the room. he doesn't sit at the table. he sits in a chair that's off to itself. unlike nick cannon IRL who seems pretty healthy and confident, paul is scrawny and shy. kerry waves at him, but he doesn't join the group at the table until later.

each male subject that enters the room discovers that his chair is firmly bolted to the floor. all of them are made uneasy by this although tony and paul show it more than crawford. kerry just slid into her seat although she does notice this when paul enters because where he's seated she can see his feet.

after giving the subjects a while to stew, dr. phillips enters the room. he acts very friendly as he passes out their consent forms saying don't blame him for the extra paperwork, it's not his idea. he tells them the experiment pays $250 for the day. he says it's an 8-hour experiment and people will be eliminated along the way, but that will not affect their compensation. he tells them that experiment will be in four phases and phase one began when he entered the room. since he seems friendly and the experiment pays well, the subjects sign their forms. he asks them to put a contact number at the top. when paul asks, "what if we don't have one?" the doctor clamps him on the shoulder and tells him to just leave it blank. then he has them take their personal possession (contents of pockets, cell phones.. everything but clothing) take up and placed in large envelope. crawford says this has never happened before and dr. phillips promises him that he will get it back.


after all of these things are taken care of, dr. phillips takes kerry's face in his hands and asks, "what's your name, darling?" kerry, ever friendly, smiles and gives her name. he quickly pulls out out a pistol and shoots her then whisks out of the room. not only are the people in the room shocked beyond belief, so is emily. but, she quickly hides her reaction even as she sees tony trying to deny what he just saw to say it's just a joke to put on youtube. (i don't consider kerry's death a spoiler since she's shown dead in promotional artwork.)

as tony accepts reality, paul discovers there are a lot of names as well as other writing on the wall. having nothing else to use, tony uses kerry's blood in order to make some of these things readable. around this time, a gun is introduced to the participants. because he was huddled by the door, paul winds up with the gun. as if this was not enough to contend with they hear noises... people talking and praying in arabic as well as some elevator music.

then, the men get a question which they will have two hours to answer: from 1-33, which number do american choose most often. they decide they will all chose 7 (tony's answser). when they're officially asked, paul deviates from the plan and gives 17 as his answer. crawford answers last and, glaring at paul, yells "seven!" then they are put to sleep with gas and removed from the room by medical personnel.

to her credit, emily figures out an acceptable way of asking "why the fuck are you doing this shit?" dr. phillips starts telling her that "the mk projects" were never really under the control of the government. after 9/11, he says, they were given a free reign. they have come up with a fucked up plan he calls mk patriot. they are in the selection process at this stage. given this new information, emily discerns what they may be going for and tells him she thinks there's an easier way. he replies that everything in the room has been very, very carefully developed. he brags that adding the names and messages to the wall has sped things up considerably.

emily finally gives vent to her feelings as she cries in the stall in the ladies' room. she's not just crying for the people in the experiment. she's crying for herself... it takes very little to imagine that if she were to not pass the interview, she will be killed herself. even though, unlike the people in the experiment who were brought in a van, she drove her own car... there are locked doors between herself and that car.

dr. phillips tells her the tape she was watching took place that morning and that the men who were gassed have been out about three hours. to her horror, the medical personnel bring the unconsious men back into the room and carefully place them on the floor. dr. phillips gives her a white coat and a gas mask.

just before they leave, they shoot tony. so, when paul and crawford come to they find this fresh horror. then paul realizes their blood has been taken.

I am Back

Hi everyone. Well, when last we left our heartbreaking saga things were sucking. Life is just difficult. It can always be worse. I don't have teevee any more. But, I have a lot of movies, so I just watch those. I've been watching Disney movies lately because um, well no good reason. I don't have a child or anything. God forbid I would show this stuff to an actual developing mind. LOL Last night I watched Winnie the POOH because one of the yard pets named Fat Squirrel got hit by a car (p.s., this is a wild animal, my actual pets are indoors where cars tend to not be).

Saturday, September 17, 2011

toddlers and tiaras, omg where is the fbi? (edited)

I just watched a little girl parade out on stage dressed like julia roberts in pretty woman. There is misinformation that she wore the dress at the end of the movie. But, she wore TWO outfits from that movie.

The streetwalker outfit she wore in the actual competition. There was even a building so she could walk a street! Omg, I can't believe some fking whore put her baby in that! Three years old! THREE! The polka dot dress the girl wore during the awards portion. It isn't from the "end of the movie". It is from the part where julia roberts is rented for a few days and is given instructions to shop.

That wasn't the only questionable outfit. Another girl was dressed as marilyn monroe. Again three. It was a variation of the famous white dress from "seven year itch." The subway grate scene except they'd added white gloves. I guess the only reason they didn't have her skirt blow up like marilyn's is they couldn't figure out how to do it.

Fun fact, joe dimaggio was there when that scene was filmed. Joe didn't appreciate people looking up his wife's dress. Movie or no movie. Seems like he socked a few guys in the jaw. So, if something is risque for adults maybe it is not a good idea for three years old.

Another fun fact, there are certain celebrity women you NEVER want to dress your daughter like and marilyn is number one. There are more reasons than I can go into. But, why should I? Why should you want to dress your baby like a sex symbol?

Other things to avoid:
Animal print especially big cat (leopard, tiger, etc.)
red and black (it's blood and darkness)
feather especially peacock
peace signs (both the one in the circle and holding up two fingers)
Dressing like an animal
Shaking/spanking the booty
high heels
butterflies especially monarch butterflies
licking lollipops

(Grr, this thing accidentally published before I meant for it to, someone has my cell # on their dish network account and they get a lot of late calls. Dish network cannot change it. I personally have direct tv)

Anyway, parents all of the things on that list have connections you may not know about. But, people looking at your kid do know.

Just let them play outside. Most of these kids don't seem to really want to do this.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

more sickness to go around always..

Sick again and sleeping lots. I have been meaning to post. I have seen a few notable movies lately. I have also seen a few things I need to complain about. As usual. Tee he'd

Are generics really as good as brand? I don’t think so based on some recent experiences.

A few of my old posts are still getting pageviews by innocent people who have googled on by.


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

holly j pees herself on degrassi

Can you imagine being in the home stretch of your senior year and you literally leave a little puddle on the floor during a presentation? Me neither, but I see a G.E.D. (or whatever the canadian equivalent is) in your future.

Why did this happen? Well, holly j was so busy go getting she didn't go to the doctor even though she thought she had strep throat. Then she passes right the fuck out in a presentation before the peeing incident and flees the e.r. (or whatever that was she went to which involved a doctor) to keep on go getting. So, the strep settled in home girl's kidneys. Not kidding.