when you find yourself adding bongos, stop and think wtf you are doing

i cannot even...

o.k., adam lambert has this song called "whattya want from me" (or some other grammatically tortured crap). because this has bugged me ever since i heard it, i must share: this is an unreleased pink song... it's pretty obvious once you know because he uses her phrasing exactly.

well, apparently everyone else in america appreciates the fuck out of the song because now we have the UNPLUGGED VERSION (you know for the people who can't handle the hard rock sound of adam fucking lambert) with BONGOS! oh, and it's slower. it may also be in b&w, but i don't think so. i think i am confusing him with pink herself now.

argh. also, this jason bieber kid needs to be concerned that he is 16 and his voice hasn't changed. seriously. he's got a song where ludacris raps a bit about a girl he loved when he was 13 (a girl ludacris loved). yeah, ludacris probably seriously believed this kid was about 12.

p.s., i know i resisted the urge to post about 30 seconds... but.. the bongos... it was the bongos!

lady antebellum, how stupid are people really?

i just heard on vh1 that people do not know what this name means. AARGGGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!! there a thing i have heard of called a 'dictionary' look it the fuck up. i am not into this group. it sounds like country music to me. most country music (with only a few songs notable exception) sucks so bad i cannot even deal.

speaking of things i cannot deal with...

being raised with a bunch of baby boomers, i hate the beatles. i mean, i can't listen to them hardly at all. but i don't think they suck... it's just me. they are talented. i get why other people might like them. but, maybe in 30 more years, i can try them out.

so, that's what i meant by john lennon. i don't listen to his stuff really. but, he was really talented. he wasn't putting out crap by any means (i am counting yoko's contributions separately).

any time there is someone talented at the forefront of music, it does elevate everything. and i can appreciate that even if that person isn't someone i am personally into. that's why it really upsets me about john dying like he did. if he'd been around some of the crap we all lived through musically probably wouldn't have happened because they'd been too embarrassed to put crap like that out.

the record companies apparently want cookie cutter music. they want everyone to be expendable and replaceable. they do not want to be held hostage to some "artiste" who can't think of anything to put on his/her album right now when they would really like a bestseller. that's why sometimes people who could have long careers really do not (in fact this often seems to be due to some sort of tragic death, go figure).

and they wonder why we could give a shit that they are going out of business. in fact, we're a bit gleeful about it... we know good and well that the people who have talent will be able to get their music out. they always have and they always will. back in the day, people passed mix tapes around and then you'd go on the EPIC SEARCH to find someone who carried the real thing for your favorites. well, it's way easier now.

as for cookie cutter, a good example of what i mean is this rich chick from a rich suburb kesha (she spells it with a '$', but fuck that noise). she's working the dirty ho angle. wtfever. i know exactly where she is from and i have to LOL. but her song tik tok, dance hit, anyone with any ability could make that a hit. now, many people wouldn't lower themselves to that simplistic rhyme scheme and whatnot. but if they would... it'd be a hit. now, she's got TWO MORE SONGS. if anyone spends money on this .... gah, i have to wonder. they still have radio, right? listen 4 free, peeps.

so, jessica simpson is kind of a more simplistic pop star type, but she's not working the dirty ho angle (no offense to dirty hos, but if you work it you ought to be one). i think she's trying to be herself. and i do respect this. still not going to listen to her, but i do respect this. plus, being mean to her seems a lot like kicking a puppy. i think she realizes she's not the "be all and end all of music".

hmmm... i think anyone who ever actually WAS the "be all and end all of music" has too much respect for other composers to run off at the mouth like that. but, what do i know, i have never met these people as they have been dead for some centuries.

as for my musical taste... yeah, i am from that really fucking annoying gen x group to is picky as fuck about all music and super hyper critical. and i'm totes used to someone saying "i don't liiiiiike that! can't we listen to air supply???" (a direct quote from one of my h.s. hangout partners)

but i have studied music, so i respect if someone has skill on their instrument or can write good lyrics or is trying new things. anyone who is doing all of that and doing it well, is pretty impressive, no matter what genre they're working. and it's sad that the music industry doesn't seem to appreciate it.

not the whole industry, naturally, there are people who are into talent. but they are always outnumbered by people who are into money. apparently pairing the two together seems to be more trouble than it's worth.

simon cowell is dead to me

oh, HELL NO! simon cowell got wind that quincy jones was going to do a 25th anniversary edition of "we are the world". o.k., whatever.

quincy jones and lionel richie (and michael jackson chimed in with "we are the children" and possibly a "shamoan" or two) wrote the thing, so again. whatever.

but simon has proven his evilness by using for "his" "charity" single a real song. a song that wasn't stupid... he's using "everybody hurts" by r.e.m.

only, he's lined up some singers... honestly, I stopped reading after the second name because that name is MILEY CYRUS. oh, hell no, she can't sing even a little at all. wtf? this is sick and wrong. the first name was susan boyle. hello, michael stipe sings perfectly well.

I assume this is for haiti which, if so, is kind of mean. "everybody hurts"? I didn't just have a building fall on me, so i'd say my pain level is something i don't want to complain to people in haiti about.

also... we don't really need "awareness" about haiti. they straight up need help. so, why not stop with all the nonsense and just send the fucking money straight to them NOW? yes, there's less showing off. but, if assholes could refrain from skimming money from charities more money could be sent faster.

and isn't helping people what charity is about?

however, simon cowell is still dead to me. there was no need to expose the public to miley cyrus trying to cover people who can actually sing.

the snakemonster: devoid of any semblance of talent

I don't know exactly why, but the people at cracked call miley cyrus the snakemonster. possibly because she has no discernable talent so the only assumption we can make is that she is something evil. like a snakemonster.

yes, I watched her "party in the usa" video. this would also be the first (and I pray the only) time to have heard this "song."

well, I have to apologize all over the place to lady gaga. she is a gorgeously beautiful and fabulous nightengale. talent forms an aura of awesomeness all around her. she also manages not to look like a prostitute being dragged in to nightcourt in her sexy weird outfits.

miley can't sing, she can't dance, she has a bad personality, she can't act, she's not very pretty, she is annoying.
WHY DOES SHE HAVE A CAREER? why?

not only does she have one, but her career has revitalized billy ray's career. I cannot overstate how much I never wanted that to happen.

billy ray can't sing, he acts like a big wooden ham, he has negative charisma... I just can't stand him. I never could. but he's back and they even made a made for tv movie for christmas with him. which means we'll have to see it 65 times per year every year that has a christmas.

also, they are grooming miley's younger sister noah to do whatever miley does. so, pretty soon there will be two of them. plus, miley has a brother who's in a band or whatever.

back to "party in the usa"... it was BEYOND AWFUL. there seems to be something sinister about it.

miley, wearing her usual whorewear, is kicking through the dust and walking by pickup trucks. the place where the video is set looks like a good location for an if you like dirt and desolation in your décor.

the lyrics are a bit sickening... something about seeing the hollywood sign and being excited. then remembering at the moment she saw it she was listening to a jay-z song.

then she tells us she's nodding her head and moving her hips and there's a party in the usa. it disturbs me and I think it gave me a nightmare.

at the end of the video, miley and her grubby (pretend) friends are in a big old birdcage. miley's standing up on the swing and everyone else is climbing around.

I am afraid. I hope the pristine lady gaga does not associate with such people. say what you will, at least with lady gaga I can usually figure out that i'm listening to someone sing. also, I never have to see lady gaga doing weird things with her dad.

and mind you, lady gaga does things like wear a fetish suit, "bleed" during performances, and carry around a teacup. but, she actually has a pretty voice when you get a chance to hear it. and I have never heard her screeching about her purity ring.

this reminds me, one of the jonas brothers (kevin? I don't know, the one oldest maybe) was prancing about in an aleister crowley t-shirt. now, I have never once run across an aleister crowley shirt in a store, so he had to deliberately obtain this shirt. I wonder what his pal aleister crowley would think about purity rings.

there's no hope for music...

miley cyrus also met the queen. she was also wearing a red dress. (oh, and wendy williams says lady gaga's dress was leather which seems more plausible, actually.) so, red dress at important events and butterflies in weird places (gaga has been known to "play" a butterfly-covered piano and miley has them all over everything). these seem to be current indicators of acts that aren't going anywhere no matter how many innocent people their cauterwaling deafens. oh, btw, sweet lil miley (as if) "performed" with her hand near her crotch. KLASSY!!

shocking pop (snicker)

they are still going on about the adam lambert "controversy." I have two words: dress rehearsal.

I didn't watch the amas because award shows suck. I have seen a snippet from adam's performance. what I see is a LOT of people on stage who would all be falling over each other if they hadn't rehearsed.

so, the tv people knew what adam would do. if they actually had any problem with it, they had a chance to make him change it. since this only occupies a few seconds of his performance, he easily could have made the changes and kept his overall performance.

this got on tv because it was supposed to... granted, with a larger audience everyone may have performed with more enthusiasm, it would still be basically the same thing.

what I saw wasn't very entertaining. it seemed rushed. bleat a few words, pose, bleat, do controversial thing, bleat, pose, controversial thing, etc. the kissing (a "man") was the best part because that means it's over and my ears and eyes are glad.

now, they've dragged lady gaga into it... she gets away with it. blah, blah. who cares? why are people even listening to this crap?