Saturday, September 17, 2011

toddlers and tiaras, omg where is the fbi? (edited)

I just watched a little girl parade out on stage dressed like julia roberts in pretty woman. There is misinformation that she wore the dress at the end of the movie. But, she wore TWO outfits from that movie.

The streetwalker outfit she wore in the actual competition. There was even a building so she could walk a street! Omg, I can't believe some fking whore put her baby in that! Three years old! THREE! The polka dot dress the girl wore during the awards portion. It isn't from the "end of the movie". It is from the part where julia roberts is rented for a few days and is given instructions to shop.

That wasn't the only questionable outfit. Another girl was dressed as marilyn monroe. Again three. It was a variation of the famous white dress from "seven year itch." The subway grate scene except they'd added white gloves. I guess the only reason they didn't have her skirt blow up like marilyn's is they couldn't figure out how to do it.

Fun fact, joe dimaggio was there when that scene was filmed. Joe didn't appreciate people looking up his wife's dress. Movie or no movie. Seems like he socked a few guys in the jaw. So, if something is risque for adults maybe it is not a good idea for three years old.

Another fun fact, there are certain celebrity women you NEVER want to dress your daughter like and marilyn is number one. There are more reasons than I can go into. But, why should I? Why should you want to dress your baby like a sex symbol?

Other things to avoid:
Animal print especially big cat (leopard, tiger, etc.)
red and black (it's blood and darkness)
feather especially peacock
peace signs (both the one in the circle and holding up two fingers)
Dressing like an animal
Shaking/spanking the booty
high heels
butterflies especially monarch butterflies
licking lollipops

(Grr, this thing accidentally published before I meant for it to, someone has my cell # on their dish network account and they get a lot of late calls. Dish network cannot change it. I personally have direct tv)

Anyway, parents all of the things on that list have connections you may not know about. But, people looking at your kid do know.

Just let them play outside. Most of these kids don't seem to really want to do this.